beep
beep
beep
"Autumn Elizabeth Hayes wake up right now. you have school in a half hour and you're going to be late for the bus. again."
i groaned, sliding off my bed and headed to the shower.
when I was done, I put on some black skinny jeans, an all time low t-shirt, and tied a flannel around my waist.
I ran down the stairs, grabbing my bag with the homework that I didn't do in it, and started out the door. my mum called me back, though. "oh and autumn?"
"yeah mom?"
"don't be late today. no hanging out with any of your friends after school. I have something important to tell you."
"ok mom, I'll be home at 3," i said, and walked out the door. it's not like I have any friends anyway, so that shouldn't be a problem. I started walking to my bus stop at the corner of the next street over. I hate walking but it makes me skinnier, and I need to be skinnier. a lot skinnier.
I was so scared for school today. maeve evans- my old best friend who is now my main bully- said that she would make my life even worse. starting today.
as I got onto the bus and waited to be dropped off at living hell. I zoned out, like I do almost every bus ride, and the demons in my head come at me again.
you're so stupid, you worthless slut!
ugly!
fat!
stupid!
please. stop.
why should I? im just speaking the truth.
right when I start tearing up, i could start to see the school in the distance, oh no. I can see maeve and her group of sluts standing with her. they were all standing there at the door, ready to torment me. to make my life hell, even though it already was. I start to panic about what my mom said to me this morning, i have something really important to tell you.
what if shes tired of me too? I wouldn't be surprised. She's probably going to put me up for adoption or something because she hates me. everyone hates me. even me. no, especially me.
when the bus finally lets us off, i stand behind the building, scared to confront them. about 20 minutes later, the bell rings and im forced to go to the door for the grade 10 students. before I have time to hide, maeve spots me starts to walk up to me. I'm terrified.
"hey stupid slut, why are you hiding? you're pathetic, you know that right?"
shes right, ya know.
i didn't know how to respond. everyone was staring at me.
"uh, um, i-"
"oh would you look at that! the little freak doesn't even know how to talk! well, considering her dad left before he could teach her.."
that's it. they can't bring up my father. "don't talk about my dad. ever."
"awh, look at it. getting all defensive over her father that doesn't even love her enough to live in the same place as her."
im crying, I can feel it. im so weak, they're right. I am pathetic. I head into school, and head to my first class. the whole day was a blur.
•
I walked home today, I could use the excersize. when I get to my front door, i start to panic. again. what if my mom says she doesn't like me anymore? what if she's going to leave me like my dad left me? what if she's taking Jake away from me to leave me alone? I have to stop worrying. when I open my door, my mom is sitting on the couch, waiting for me.
"hey mom."
"hello honey, how was school?"
"it was great," I lied with a smile. I made my way over to the couch to sit with her.
"autumn, I have something to tell you."
oh no. here it comes. she's leaving me too.
"autumn, were moving to Australia."
what!?
