I always follow my instincts because most of the time, it was right. But there are also times when I just want to bury its voice because I know where it will lead me.
Paglingon ko ay tama ang aking hinala dahil nakita ko ang professor namin noon sa World History. Hindi nagbago ang maamo niyang mukha but it looks like she aged a lot, maybe because of stress. She smiled at me when our eyes met. Nakaupo siya sa front desk kaya sinenyasan niya akong lumapit sa kaniya.
"Hello po." I greeted.
"How are you? I haven't heard anything about you since you graduated." tugon niya.
"Naging busy lang po sa banda." sabi ko na lang kahit sinadya kong putulin saglit 'yong communications ko sa common acquaintances namin.
"I heard that your band was making its name. Good for you. How about Gil? Sinagot mo na ba?" aniya sabay tawa.
This is what I'm talking about. Alam ko na doon pa rin aabot ang conversation namin ng Professor ko. Witnessed siya sa ka-corny'han namin dati, e. One time, a blocmate of ours accidentally saw me and to my luck, she approached me. Then after a series of how are you's, she asked if we're still together, I didn't know how to react or what to respond that time dahil fresh pa rin sa akin lahat, good thing that someone called her.
But this.. hindi ko alam kung paano ko malulusutan. So, I'm gonna use my last resort.
"Ma'am, you know me for being polite but I just need to answer the call of nature." sabi ko habang hawak sa aking tiyan.
She laughed. "Go ahead," I bowed and excused myself.
I did the triumphant laugh and mouthed yes. It worked!
Pero totoo naman na pupunta ako sa washroom which I regretted dahil bumungad sa akin ang pasilyo kung saan madalas siya mag-hintay sa akin.
Tanggap ko naman na wala na siya, pero ramdam ko pa rin 'yong sakit.
It's just that.. I already accepted some things, that he is not coming back and that I should stop waiting for him. But it doesn't mean that I will be sheltered from pain. Accepting is different from healing, and years had passed.. but I'm not yet healed.
'Yong sakit na naramdaman ko no'ng umalis siya, mas doble sa tuwing mare-realize ko na hindi na talaga siya babalik.
Leche talaga.
Ibinagsak ko ang katawan ko sa sofa habang dumiretso si Ina sa kaniyang kuwarto. Pinikit ko ng bahagya ang aking mata at hinilot ang aking sentido dahil sobra-sobrang pagre-recollect yata ng memories ang ginawa ng utak ko.
I snatched my phone from my pocket and started fiddling with it. I visited my Twitter and saw a photo that made my eyes rolled. I immediately went to our group chat and send it.
Ako:
Oops! Ang larawang ito ay hindi sumusunod sa aming mga alituntunin sa nilalaman. Upang magpatuloy sa pag-publish, subukan itong alisin o mag-upload ng bago.
Ang harot niyo talaga.
Val: HSHAHAHAHA
Clair: Ngi. Inggit ka lang, e.
Ako:
Excuse me. Hindi ko ba sinabi na jowa ko si Harry?
Sayi: Weh? Tanghali na, tulog ka pa yata, Trix.
Jazz: E kung sinagot mo si ano? #friendzoned
Ako:
Ang papanget niyo. Magsama-sama kayo!
Via: Don't ya worrryyy. Punta kami sa gig niyo mamaya. Love you, girl.
I grinned at their remarks. Sure, he took a part of me when he left and I my heart was nowhere to be found when I realized that I lost him. But as for them? I will take the unfamiliar roads if it means finding their lost asses, because they did the same thing when it once happened to me. But not the whole reason why I'd like to save their lost asses. I just love these dorks. And we will always have each others' back, no doubt about it.
