𝐔𝐤𝐢𝐲𝐨 タ永唄

𝒞𝒽𝒶𝓅𝓉𝑒𝓇 18

After leaving it was clear that I was going to be fine but on our way to who knows where after we took some money and Yoongi took his dad's truck we left. Leaving no trace behind. Not a single thing I guess we couldn't tell anyone where we were going because WE didn't even know where we were going. We followed the road. And while the boys apart from Jin was sleeping I wrote a song to my parents. (This song belongs to NF i just changed a few lyrics to fit the story pls go listen its really good but sad)

How could you leave us so unexpected?
We were waiting, we were waiting
For you but you just left us
We needed you, I needed you

I don't know what its like to me addicted to pills
But I know what its like to be a witness it kills
Mama told me she loved me, im thinking this isn't real
I think of you when I get a whiff of that cigarette smell,yeah
Welcome to the bottom of hell
They say pain is a prison, let me out of my cell
Dad said his proud of me but he don't know me that well
Sit in my room, tears running down my face and I yell
Into my pillowcase, you said your coming to get me
Then call a minute later just to tell me your not, Im humiliated
Im in a room a parent I barely know
Some lady was sitting in the corner watching us while she was taking notes
I don't get it dad don't you want to see your baby grow?
I guess that pills are more important, all you have to say is No
But you won't do it will you? Your gonna keep popping till those pills kill you
Dad I know your gone but I can still feel you

Why would you leave us? Why would you leave us here?
How could you leave us here?
How could you leave us? Why would you leave us?

I had this picture in my room and it killed me
But I don't need the picture of my dad I need the real thing
Now a relationship is something we won't ever have
Why do I feel like I lost something I never had?
You should have been there when I graduated
Told me your proud of me and congratulations
Instead you left me at the window waiting
Where are you at dad? I was too young to understand where your af huh?
Yeah mom I know those drugs got you held captive
I can see it in your eyes, they got your mind captured
Some say its fun getting high but im not laughing
What you don't realise and whag your not grasping
That I was nothing but a kid who couldn't understand
I aint going to say that I forgive you cause it hasn't happened
I thought that maybe I would feel better as the time passes
If you really cared for me, then where you at then?

Our last conversation we were sitting in the living room
Talking about my music and I gave you something to listen to
You started crying saying this isn't you
Couple weeks later I guess you were singing a different tune
You took those pills for the last time didn't you?
They took you from me once, guess they came back to finish you
Crying my eyes out in a car is difficult
Music is the only place I can go to scream at you
It takes everything inside me not to go scream at your funeral
Sitting in my chair, the person talking is pitiful
I wish you were here dad but everytime I picture you
All I feel is pain, I hate the way I remember you
They found you on the floor, I could tell that you felt hollow
Gave everything you had plus your life to those pill bottles
Gave everything you had plus your life to those pill bottles

Don't know if you hear me or not, but if your still watching why

After I finish writing Namjoon woke up. I gave him to read them and he never said anything he just hugged me. I didn't realize it but I was crying, I didn't realize I was in that much need of a hug till he held me tight telling me that everything was going to be fine and we will have the time of our lives because we had each other