talk.

𝐭𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐡

𝐜𝐮𝐫𝐫𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐥𝐲 𝐩𝐥𝐚𝐲𝐢𝐧𝐠 

𝐥𝐞𝐯𝐚𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐫 

 𝐬𝐭𝐫𝐚𝐲 𝐤𝐢𝐝𝐬

numb.

that was all i felt.

wait.

haven't i been here before?

i'm in water up to my ankles. there's a white light in front of me. how far is it? i don't know. i just follow it. 

i feel warm. it's hard to breathe. but i feel fine. the light bathes me in a soft light. i step through. i'm in my old room in vancouver. my mom is sitting on my bed, looking around my room and holding something. she doesn't look any different. pale skin just like mine. dark, long black hair. a sad smile.

'mom..' i whisper. tears fall from my eyes.

she looked up. 'mark..'

she stood up. she's wearing a white night gown. the one she was wearing that day. i look down. she's holding the gun.

she notices where i'm looking. she looks up sadly. 'mark.. sweetheart i'm so sorry..' she wraps me in such a huge hug. i wrap my arms around her and i cry.

'why did you do this to me? you left me here all alone..'

'i know, mark.. i just couldn't stay.. i didn't know what else to do..'

'i wanna stay here with you. please let me stay. i wanna be happy..'

mom held my face and wiped my tears with her fingers. 'you have a choice, mark. you have people who love you. like that boy. what was his name?'

i blush. 'd-donghyuck..'

'right! him. he loves you so much. you don't want to hurt him, do you?' she gives me a smile.

i look up at her.

'they're out there, trying desperately to help you.'

donghyuck pulled the soaked boy and hugged him close to his chest. he was crying. "mark. no no no, come on baby."  he lay the boy onto the damp grass and he tried cpr on him, pumping his chest a few times before opening mark's mouth and blowing. he repeated the process multiple times.

'but.. what about you?' i ask.

mom smiled. 'i'll never leave you. i'm still with you mark. in here.' she poked my chest. i smiled softly. 'do you remember our trip to miami?'