trust me II tsukkiyama II

Meetup

     love goes out to anyone reading this! If no one has told you this today, you are beautiful, unique, smart, and enough! Strive to be your best self no matter what others say about you <3

       I told Yamaguchi to meet me at the end of the hall after his class today, but he's not here. He always gets nervous after tests, so I wanted to be there in case he was really struggling. Even if I'm not good with words, I still want to be there for him. His class isn't far away, where is he? I've waited for two minutes now. Three. Four. Where is he? I decided to text him and make sure he was alright.

To: Yams
Hey are we still meeting up

     It didn't take long before I got a response.

From: Yams
sorry tsukki! i totally forgot!! i had to go to the bathroom real quick will you wait for me for a second??

To: Yams
That's fine. Don't take too long or we'll be late to science.

     Maybe that was too harsh, but Yamaguchi really needs to budget his time better. He knows today is review before the test tomorrow, and we both know he's not very good at physics. I thought about texting Yamaguchi again, but before I pulled out my phone I heard a familiar voice behind me.

     "Tsukki! Hi! I'm sorry for almost making us late!" Yamaguchi exclaimed as we began walking to our next period. I don't know why he apologizes to me so much. He is nothing but kind and helpful, but of course I can't tell him that. It would be weird if I was all friendly and flattering all of the sudden.

     "It's really okay Yams. I just think you need to work on being so forgetful. One of these days you'll forget to write an essay instead of just meeting up with me." I replied nonchalantly. Ask I looked over to meet his eyes, I noticed they were a little red, "Are you okay? Your eyes look puffy," God dammit, why am I always so blunt?

     "Oh I'm alright! I actually went to the bathroom to get an eyelash out of my eye, so it might still be a little bit irritated," Yamaguchi answered quickly. I shrugged and we continued to class.

     All throughout second period, Yamaguchi was inattentive. He was brushing his hands through his hair, fidgeting with the corner of his notebook, and clicking his pen. I tried to ignore it and let him do what he needed to do, but the pen just sounded like a hammer hitting my head every time it clicked. It finally got to me as I reached out and grabbed his shoulder to get his attention. He flinched away from my hand and looked at me as if he'd seen a ghost.

     "Didn't mean to startle you," that counted as an apology, right? "You have got to stop clicking your pen, though- it's really loud."

      Yamaguchi still looked mortified as he sat his pen down and nodded in understanding. I wanted to hug him a little bit. That sounds dumb, but he has been on edge since I saw him in the hallway. It's totally normal to want to hug your friend when he's nervous. I also kind of wanted to run my hands through his hair. Maybe just once. It looks really soft. Nope nope nope that's where things aren't friendly anymore. But maybe it would make him feel better? He looks stressed out. Maybe I'll just ask him if he's ok later.

     I tried my best to focus on the rest of the review so I could re-teach it to Yamaguchi later, but I kept finding myself wondering why he freaked out so bad when I touched him earlier. Did he think it was creepy for me to do? Was he just zoning out? Was he grossed out by me? I felt like the last option was probably the least likely. After all, he did basically hold my hand yesterday. Then again, maybe he felt like he couldn't take his hand away first? I just couldn't get that boy out of my head. Who could get the freckles that dotted his face and his adorable grin out of their head? Wait that's creepy. I shouldn't think about my best friend like that. 

     The school bell pulled me out of my spiral and back to real life. As I looked over at Yamaguchi, I noticed his furrowed brows and slight frown as he put his review packet back into his backpack. I considered asking him what was wrong, but he was probably just worried about the test tomorrow. I could help him study later, so for now I left him to contemplate. We got our lunches and went to sit outside together.

     "Do you need me to clarify anything from class today?" I asked Yamaguchi as we began to eat.

     " Umm... For now I don't think so! " he responded happily. That was the brunette I knew, "When I get home I'm going to work on the review, and I'll text you if I get stuck! If that doesn't bother you..."

     "Why would it bother me Yams? I just asked if you needed me to clarify anything. Even if you don't need anything now, I am always willing to help you later. " Shit! Maybe that was too forward! Should I say something sarcastic to even things out? Just as I was about to say something rude, I looked over to see Yamaguchi's lips form a small smile while his eyes softened. He looked a lot better than he did in class.
 
     "Thank you," Yamaguchi said quietly. His eyes left mine as he began to eat his lunch. Although he smiled for a second, as I looked over at him Yamaguchi's eyebrows had furrowed again and he seemed to be in deep thought.

     Boom baby, 1000 words!! Might as well call me George Orwell the way I'm writing these bitches.