trust me II tsukkiyama II

Overthinking Things

I got 22 reads and that makes me mega happy because it's my favorite number B') once again, you are all lovely and unique and you add so much to this world. Thank you for taking time out of your day to read what I write! It means a whole bunch to me <333

Tw// flashbacks to bullying

    Even after seeing Tsukki, I couldn't seem to calm myself down. What did I do to deserve what had just happened to me? Where those guys going to approach me again? I thought about telling Tsukki about the boys and what they wrote, but I didn't want to bother him. He does enough for me as is. He helps me study, keeps me company if my mom has to work late shifts, and he encourages me to do my best in volleyball. Tsukki also saved me from my bullies in elementary school, so this time I should just figure it out myself. He has enough to deal with on his own.

     In science class I managed to annoy and confuse Tsukki at the same time. Not only did I distract him with my pen clicking habit, I jumped out of my skin when he touched my shoulder! When I felt his hand on me, all I was able to feel was the cold, clammy hand of the tall kid in period one.

     "Didn't mean to startle you," I heard him say indifferently, "You have got to stop clicking your pen, it's really loud." I set my pen down and nodded quietly, still unable to dismiss the thought of the sentence on my desk in my mind.

Tadashi Yamaguchi, you are an annoying, ugly, freakish FAG.

Tadashi Yamaguchi, you are an annoying, ugly, freakish FAG.

Tadashi Yamaguchi, you are an obnoxious, ugly, annoying, stupid, freakish FAG.

     I looked up from the paper on my desk just for a second to see Tsukki scowling at his paper, maybe deep in thought, maybe mad, it's hard to tell with him. Either way, it was obvious that his downtrodden expression was my fault. I really am annoying, aren't I? I decided at that moment that I would never tell Tsukki about the boys that had harassed me that morning. I was bothersome enough as is, so there was no need for me to add on to that. He's just so sweet and cool, and Tsukki is really thoughtful, even if he pretends not to care. He even makes sure to bring an extra jacket for me on super cold days because I forget mine! Well, sometimes I just "forget" my jacket. His just smells so nice... God! I'm such a weight on his shoulders. He has to treat me like a child because I can barely keep track of myself or my belongings.

     Noticing that class was getting out in one minute, I put my review in my bag so I was ready to go get lunch with Tsukki. As we sat down to eat, he looked over at me and asked, "Do you need me to clarify anything from class today?"

     I figured he needed time to unwind and eat more than I needed a good grade, so I responded, " Umm... For now I don't think so! When I get home I'm going to work on the review, and I'll text you if I get stuck! If that doesn't bother you..." Wow that was really needy. I shouldn't assume he has free time to tutor me every night. I should just focus in class! As I started to prepare a bulleted list of all the reasons I didn't deserve his help, Tsukki blurted out, "Why would it bother me Yams? I just asked if you needed me to clarify anything. Even if you don't need anything now, I am always willing to help you later."

     Even as the words escaped his lips, he looked like he wanted to take them back. I tried my best to smile, but I couldn't meet his gaze. I quietly answered him with a "thank you" and began to pick at my lunch. We parted ways after lunch, and I began my walk to my history class, which I shared with Hinita. On the way there, I noticed the taller bully with black hair, maybe his name was Itsuki, leaning against a locker. There was no way for me to avoid him if I wanted to get to my class on time, so I deemed this moment my first test in getting through this aspect of my life sans help from Tsukki. Gathering my thoughts, I walked forward with as much courage as I could muster, only to feel my foot hit a shoe and send me falling on to the floor.

     "Oops." I heard Itsuki sarcastically say before gingerly walking away from me.

I have a splitting headache but I really wanted to writeeee!! Sorry if this chapter isn't as good as the last one, I'm still not super confident writing fiction stuff, and again, I have a splitting headache. Ily and goodnight/morning/evening to you fabulous reader