Hoodie Girls (Vacation, Book 1)

11. Your Heart Dont Stand a Chance

Vanessa's P. O. V

In my whole time of knowing her, I've only seen Sienna cry a few times. I could feel tears forming in the back of my eyes too, but I blinked them away. Someone had to be strong for everyone else.

It wasnt normal for Kainaz to go somewhere without telling us she would at least text back or bring one of us with her

It probably would have been fine too, if we were in Pennsylvania, but we weren't, we were in Florida, a state where we knew almost no one and was maybe the 8th most dangerous state in the U.S.

Bianca called everyone she could and the cops said that you cant put in a missing persons report in until 48 hour of them not being seen (which is utter bullshit). Of course since where asleep we didnt know how long it could have been ten hours, it could have been three.

So on a shorter note if K was safe and had us worried for nothing, I'd have to kick her ass. However if someone took her, killed her, human trafficked, threatened, lured her into a trap or some shit, let's just say me, Sienna, and Carmen...

Finna to.
Go back.
To jail.

After a few more tears and tissues, we hear a knock on the door. I looked at Sienna with my brows raised, I didnt know who it was, it's not like I was expecting vistors.

It could have been Kainaz, it could have been the alleged kidnapper, it could have been someone who knew where K was, it could have been a girl scout, it could have been Red Riding Hood for f*ck's sakes. You never really know, so I grabbed my umbrella just in case.

I watched her every moment prepared for anything, ready to back her up if needed. What I did see though, was not what I was expecting.

It was those same boys, they just seemed to be everywhere, at the pier, the bachata event, Sienna's instagram (yeah girl I saw that), and now they were at our condo.

I was a little shocked, but I didn't lower my weapon. I waited for her to say something to them, because if she didn't I would.

She didnt react the way I had anticipated though, I expected her to be at least little suspicious, confused, surprised, but nooooooooooo, she HUGGED this mother fucker. Like excuse me.

I-

Am I missing something?

What is going on? 

I already knew my mouth was wide enough to catch flies. We all shuffled uncomfortably, looking at our feet, scratching the back of our necks.

The only thing you could hear was the faint of sound Bianca talking to someone on the other side of the line, in the kitchen. The quietness was unpleasant, and I didnt know how to end it.

After a few minutes of studying my shoes I felt eyes on me and instinctively I looked up to meet them. It was him he was standing beside Derek, he was wearing a black Nike hoodie and basketball shorts, we both looked away blushing, reminiscing on last night.

I had had a little too much to drink, I wasnt drunk, but there was enough alcohol in my system for me not to think completely straight. I knew the buzz was what made the kiss happen.

I didnt regret it, drunk words are sober thoughts same must apply to our actions.

I had felt the little butterflies, breathed in the smell of his cologne, felt flustered right after.

It was my first time kissing a guy. I never expected it to happen the way it did. I made the first move, which I never would have done sober. Things werent cumbersome after, it was... beautiful.

In the books they always describe it as fireworks being set off, no that's not what it was like for me. Nothing exciting, nothing making me want to jump.

No, it was like I had been drowning my whole life until that one moment without realizing. And then during that kiss I was floating, I was at peace with not just myself, but the universe. Everything good and bad was washed away with the waves that lightly lapped against my sides. The only thing in my mind was him, everything else wasnt empty per say, it was more clean.

Did it always feel like this when you kissed a boy? I wouldn't know I just know I liked it

Still even the thought of last night made my fingernails dig into my hands, caused headaches, it felt like someone was sitting on my stomach.

I knew that I was scared, scared of how much tension would be in the air around us after those delicate seconds. We would both always be thinking about that same moment, always wondering what we were to each other and if we could be something more.

Few people in my life stayed long enough for us to develop a connection or even a relationship.

My dad left, tried to be in contact with me, but the thought of him disgusted me, he was a jerk. My parents always had favorites, I was never first pick, which made it easy for people to go. The sad thing about it, is that if my sperm donor died I wouldn't even shed a tear, I might even feel relieved.
If anyone else distanced themselves from me I wouldnt blink an eye, I was used to it, used to the feeling of people leaving me behind.

Even though I didnt even know him hardly at all, I got attached way too easily, I always do. It would be like walking on egg shells and expecting them not to break.

"Can we come in my legs are tired?" Derek whined snapping me out of my own world causing me to smile which is always needed. I felt dampness on my cheeks and wiped them quickly before anyone could see.

I took my glasses off and cleaned them, when I put them back on I found Derek on the couch next to me and Vallyk squatting on the ground beside us.

"Hey," he said with the sweetest look on his face, "Hi, what's u.."

Before I could finish my question two pairs of arms were wrapped around me, I didnt protest just melted into their touch, once they pulled away I glanced at them confused.

"What was that for?"

Derek shrugged, "You look like you needed a hug." I smiled. I hadn't talk to Derek once last night, I guess he just didnt care. He was kind, but broken like me and I could tell that these jokes were facades.

"Do you usually go hugging people you barely know?"

"On the occasion." Derek said making me chuckle.

"How are you?" Asked Vallyk, "Bad question, sorry." He was cute, tripping on his words, trying to find the right thing to say, his cheeks turned red every time our eyes met, "I-uh...um... how are you holding up?"

I shook my head knowing that if I said anything else on the matter I would start crying all over again.

They sat there with me in silence, it wasnt awkward like earlier, it was calming, relaxing.

After a while Derek got up to go check on Bianca leaving me and that same boy with the cute smile, I looked down at my hands and he took one in his which caught me a bit of guard if I was being honest. It didnt recoil though, I felt a squeeze of comfort and he smiled at me, "Hey, shes going to be ok."