The Crown Prince Thinks I'm a Guy

Of Emptiness and Abundant Feasts

I dreamed of the past. The life I once lived.

In particular, I dreamed of an early memory; one that I never would have remembered in my 18-year-old body. No, I chose to forget about it. What use is a daunting memory to an already weary young woman?

I was still so young. Probably even younger than I am now. Unlike most infant girls, I was born with a strong body and a quick mind. It never was of great use to me as I grew up as an obedient woman, but back then, the maids and the worker boys at the castle would simply admire my health.

'Never have I seen such a strong young miss!' they would exclaim.

Most babies, if not tended to properly, would likely die prematurely. This is especially so for baby girls. After all, unlike the prized boys, these babies were often left uncared for. Why waste precious medicine and herbs on a mere baby girl?

But, no, as luck would have it, I grew strong. Neglect has not made me weak, and instead, it has helped strengthen my resistance and immunity. Even as a toddler, I had embellished myself with that title and showed off by constantly running around the palace grounds.

I was so fast, and still so small, that I often left my tottering maids behind me.

One particular day, I snuggled into a little crack on the less populated left wing's walls, and found myself inside a narrow, dark corridor. It didn't have any working lamps, and it smelled of dust and vermin. Later on, I finally knew that those inner walkways were hidden paths once used by servants to easily travel around the palace without being seen.

But, my young self didn't think too much and instead chose to explore this new frontier. A dozen rats and a thousand cobwebs later, I finally found a source of light after twisting and turning at random.

I bent down to observe, and found a square opening with grills, probably the size of my infantile head. Probably an airway of some sorts.

I had to sit down to peek between the gaps. I saw a dimly lit room, with the usual chaise lounge of dark wood, creepy human-sized paintings, and extravagant furnishings. It looked much like the countless rooms in the palace, but what struck me was the presence of the delicate set of porcelain teacups on the table.

My mother's very own personal set. She had it hand-made from a foreign artisan, crafted only for her. She only ever drank tea from those cups.

So, I searched eagerly for her figure. I rarely did see the woman who gave birth to me... A slight movement from under the sofa hinted the movement of feet, and then, I heard voices at last.

"It's not something to feel sad about, my lady. It has only been a few years, and both the boys are healthy and growing well," said the quiet voice of a woman.

I saw a hand finally reach out for a cup, and I glimpsed mother's favorite sapphire bracelet on its wrist.

"Well, my lord husband, King Thrace, isn't growing any fonder of me. I promised him three sons, but... Even after the shamans had granted my wish..."

"My lady, speak not of your deal with the shamans of the West. You know how poorly they are thought of by the Sun God's Temple."

I saw the cup wobble in my mother's grasp. She set it down shakily back into its saucer.

"... I know, Minerva. I only speak of these things with you," I heard my mother whisper, a slight warning in her tone.

"I understand, my lady, and I am honored by your trust. But, the walls are thin in this particular castle. We never know who might be peeping in."

I held my breath, for even my undeveloped mind could tell that their topic was very serious.

After a moment of silence, mother spoke again. "Minerva, what am I to do? We have tried for three years and yet I have not shown sign of carrying a child. What if I have reached my limit? I have always had a weak body... Oh, Minerva, what if that wretched daughter of mine would be my last?"