Mischievous Machine [old]

Bratt Faux

Why'd my mom name me Bratt? Like hell, I was a brat growing up but seriously what kind of a name is that? I ponder as I sit on a chair with my legs perched on a table next to me, while staring at the ceiling.

"Boss we've spotted an imperial ship."

A member of my crew comes in. A woman with a short stature with a slightly dirty yet pretty face.

Holy shit finally something actually fun! I was getting really bored there. 

"Sal can you imagine?"

"Yes yes boss I can."

"I was actually thinking about a pointless thing again like my name seriously. Can you believe how bored I was? Hell I even forgot that I told you SONS OF BITCHES TO ACTUALLY KNOCK ON THE FUCKING DOOR!"

"I'm sorry boss..."

"Nah don't sweat it Sal anyway how big's the ship?"

"It's an Alsta class cruiser."

"A what? I didn't ask the damn name of the piece of junk."

With a sigh Sal responds.

"It's very big..."

A VERY BIG?

"We haven't had a very big in like forever ya know?"

Sal nods meekly.

I wonder what they're doing around these parts?

"Sal what if they're carrying something really cool?"

"I can't believe you can think about this stuff right now!"

Hmmm?

"Getting nervous are we?"

"You're not even thinking about whether or not we'll fight. In fact all you're already thinking about the spoils."

This is why I hate dealing with newbies. I wish Heller was here. He was good with the ladies too...

"Stupid bastard Heller."

I mutter under my breath. 

"Who is Heller?"

Oh I was heard whoops.

"Doesn't matter Sal, what matters is you get those stupid ideas outta your skull before it is forcefully emptied."

'Like Heller's was' I stopped myself before saying that.

Sal visibly recoils.

"A-Are you threatening me?"

"I got no time for that."

 I stand up and quickly exit the room leaving Sal behind.

Shit where was the bridge. Why's my sense of direction so shit? Nah it's this stupid ship that's so confusing. The fact that all the section names aren't even in my spoken tongue doesn't help either. Luckily a big muscular and annoyingly handsome man runs past me and I grab him.

"Oh hey Jim."

"Eeeep."

Whats with that reaction? Although I gotta admit this isn't the first time this happened with Jim in particular.

"Hey boss..."

"You know the drill."

"Yes boss..."

We walk silently through the corridors until we reach the bridge. I do have to admit I'm pretty damn excited.

"Ahem ladies and gentlemen! Let us get ready to partake in this... someone get me an adjective for dinner!"