Familiar Pact

10. Emptiness and the Void

I am terrified and excited, hopeful and fearful all at once in a bubble of confused emotions as I watched the sunlight fade. The pessimistic devil in my head cautions me that this could still be a trick; I could still be raped tomorrow.

Little Witch could be worse than Ringmaster, though I shudder to think how. If I do disappear then this place will be like a kicked beehive tomorrow. If I manage to disappear before Ringmaster returns me to my cage then it will be Oreo's murderers who are punished. I smirk at that. They deserve whatever punishment they get. Perhaps it will sate Ringmaster's pride before he takes it out on anyone else. If he gets angry that makes the handlers angry and they'll take it out on the shifters.

It'll be my fault, my decision...

Nope, can't think of that now. Get myself out first, otherwise nothing will change.

The last streaks of red are fading as the sun sets and darkness falls. It's almost time. Please let this not be the one day she changes the pattern.

Hey, hello.. hi? Hope you're okay out there big guy? My day's been pretty dull...

I interrupt her, I've made my decision, I want to get out of here before I second-guess myself and miss the chance. I'll be your familiar for a year.

I'm not sure quite how someone can give the impression of squealing loudly whilst muffling herself and jumping up and down but she manages it.

She's so excitable. I deny any knowledge of the smile I currently have on my face.

Oh wow, okay, alright, give me a minute and I'll get the summoning cast. It might feel weird, actually I have no idea what it'll feel like as your my first but I'll do my best to make sure it doesn't hurt.

I'm trying not to snort, this girl is so damn innocent, and I'm really hoping I don't disappoint her too much. I still have no idea why she started talking to me. I have no idea where she even lives. Anything is better than here. Please Gods, it can't be worse!

I shift into my panther form, if she thinks I'm an animal I'm not going to disabuse her of the notion until I'm sure she's at least a decent person.

It's painful, as the bruises and other miscellaneous injuries heal, but shifting back into my panther is almost calming. I feel safer, less vulnerable clad in fur and claws. My beast is less impatient too, knowing the importance of stealth and waiting to pounce.

Alright, here goes...

I blink, the air seems to slowly waver around me, like it can in a heat wave. The world distorts, and my whole body is tugged sideways.

I tumble through a void. I can sense nothing, feel nothing outside my own skin and my heart beating in a frenzy. I try to grab and claw at anything, even the darkness, the utter blackness of nothing. At the last moment, as I'm sent sprawling into the world again, something in the darkness seems to give. It seems to echo and pulse with my own heartbeat. I don't have time to wonder what the hell happened.

My ears twitch and I feel someone reach for me. I'm snapping and growling before I realise.

"Oh my god, you are absolutely gorgeous and so much bigger than I was expecting, and gosh that takes a lot out of a person. Also please may I touch you, it won't hurt but it will complete the bond so you don't get sucked back into the void, because that would really suck. Pretty please."

It's the little witch... no one else could talk that fast all at once. It almost feels odd that it's out loud and not in my head. I can also feel this odd tugging towards her, like I'm meant to be close. It's disconcerting. It's hard even to contemplate if she could be a threat to me. It's close to the bond between family or packmates; an instinctive trust and desire to protect... I don't even realise I've come out of my defensive crouch and stepped towards her until she's stroking my head and I feel the bond become stronger. It rapidly eclipses the strength of any other bond. This girl is mine; my responsibility, mine to protect and support.

Then the moment is gone. I can still feel the tether, the link between us but it's not so utterly overwhelming. And I can feel her emotions.

And then what happened hit me, and I tense. I'm bound to this girl, and she's already convinced me she's not a threat. Even now I can't even imagine her harming me, and I'm closer to her than pack and what if this is permanent and I can never get free and how will I even know what my true emotions would have been if she's already tied me this tightly to her. Is this what I would have been like if Ringmaster had completed his training. Taka was ridiculously loyal to him no matter how much Ringmaster hurt him. What the heck am I ever going to do, will I even be able to be free? I can feel my breaths coming short and sharp. My blood pounds in my ears, and I'm hot and sweating, yet frozen in place. I can't move and my vision seems to almost be fading in and out.

Then the girl is hugging my shoulders and I can feel her tears running down my fur. I'm jerked out of my panic attack as I feel an outpouring of compassion and sadness and hope from her.

It startled me enough that I can try to focus on my immediate surroundings and not my panic. Ringmaster would never cry, never let himself be seen vulnerable like this.

This master is different... this girl is different.

The earth is dry and dusty. Grass and leaf litter break up the monotony of the soil. The sun is hidden behind grey clouds, so I can't estimate a time. It's not dark though so definitely a different part of the world.

I catalog my surroundings, as I force my emotions to stay in check. Later, when the girl is asleep I can let them out. I can't believe I'm free of the circus.

Small fingers touch my neck and I twitch. Little witch girl simply unbuckles my collar and lets it fall.

She's looking in my eyes as if she can see right through me. Her hazel eyes meet mine, still red rimmed from crying with me, and she says with a dignity and grace I didn't think she had:

"My name is Alyssa Meda, and it is an honour to finally meet you. I promise to protect you as you protect me, trust in you as you can trust in me, and cherish our bond for as long as we share it."

Just as I'm not really sure what to do her poise breaks. Her excited "oh my gods I can't believe I have the best familiar ever" echoes around the clearing. And for the first time in a long while I feel content; I'm outside, the sun is almost shining and I have no collar. Best of all I'm free of the circus!

Life is okay, and that's better than it's been for a long while. I hum quietly to myself as I watch the little witch scream her excitement to the world. She's weird and quirky, and I just live in the moment, enjoying the simple pleasures of the breeze ruffling through my fur and the scent of the wide wild outdoors it brings with it.

Life is okay.