Reconnected (Tokio Hotel FanFic)

Ch 21- Heilig (Sacred)

(Original) 

Ich geb mich jetzt für Dich auf/ Mein letzter Wille hilft Dir raus/ bevor das Meer unter mir - zerbricht/ Ich glaub an Dich/ Du wirst für mich - immer heilig sein

(English) 

We can't hide the truth/ I'm giving up for you now/ My final wish will guide you out/ Before the ocean breaks apart/ Underneath me/ Remember/ To me you'll be forever sacred- Tokio Hotel- Heilig

Ch 21

February 13, 2011

Leaves bled out their color as the tree dispersed the last holding on to the branches only to leave brown skeletons behind. The scenery lost beauty with the lack of vibrancy. All that was left was the brown brittle grass prickling against my flat shoes, which complemented the simple black dress I had bought yesterday. And the crunch of the dead leave echoed as I trudged to the church.

Death. Everything reminded me of it. Of her. In prisoned. Inescapable. Everywhere I looked another memory materialized by the images I tried to block out. Even if the world were monochromatic in a tone of gray, I would still remember her with the creativity of her artwork. Collages of photos shot from around the world. I couldn't forget her, but there was a constant nagging in my head. Karma had hit me hard as I never did talk to my mother while away. I never contacted her. Maybe, just maybe, if I made an effort she'd still be here with me.

Not a soul was in sight through this hollow hallway; however, as I reached the church basement where the wake was to be held, faces started to appear. Slowly, steadily, I greeted those who acknowledged me with a saddened smile etched on my face. Everyone said the exact words, 'I'm sorry for your loss. She was a great woman, who still had a full life ahead of her.' I just nodded to move on. There was nothing more to say. There were no more tears to cry.

I managed to wave through the growing crowd, finding my reserved seat in the front. Bill and Tom already took their seats next to me, with Georg and Gustav in the row directly behind them. Easily conversing, they hardly noticed my presence.

As they knew absolutely no one, they kept to themselves, not revealing the identity that we were related or the fact that they were European rock stars.

Time dragged in moments-pulling every second apart to torture me-was beyond hell for me to sit through. I didn't want to mingle with people or sit around, but I had nowhere to hide to organize my thoughts.

A head turn in my direction. "Have you decided what song you are playing yet?" Tom asked.

"I've been thinking about it. And actually I have." I took a second to look around, taking in a gasp. "I forgot my guitar. It's in the trunk. Dammit."