Elephant who?

Chapter 09

My dad was waiting for me on a booth, when he saw me he waved "Hi dear" He said "Hi" I said sitting down "I ordered you a chocolate milkshake" Today was not chat day but I was not going to be rude "Thank you" I answered.

I haven't seen my dad in over a year, he looks older, he has more gray hairs than I remember and he was wearing a suit but no tie, he looked a bit nervous, he was moving the straw of his coke from side to side.

The waitress came with my milkshake and asked us what we wanted, we just ordered the same sandwich and she left. "How you've been Amber? You look different" Skinnier? "Um... good, I joined a gym" He raised his eyebrows in surprise "And school? You've always been really dedicated" I don't like this awkward talk "It's good. I'm still dedicated I guess"

He was quiet for a few seconds and then just started talking nonstop "I just wanted to say that I'm sorry for distancing myself from you, I got the new job and I don't know, everything felt calmer without your mom around and everyone talking about your sister and I didn't know how to grieve and let alone help you. I'm sorry Amber, I don't expect you to forgive me but I just wanted you to know that I want to be better"

I let the words be processed by my brain "You don't know how it's been, dealing with my mom is the worst thing and I have to do it alone" He looked down at the table "I know and I'm sorry, I hope it's not too late to be a better father" He responded.

I was mad, but he was making the effort, that's what counts "If we are going to do this you have to know that I won't trust easily, I don't trust words anymore, I trust actions. That's how it is for you and mom now" He looked at me with a smile "Thank you Amber. This makes me so happy" He stood up and hugged me.

It wasn't am long hug but I now he needed it. After that our sandwiches arrived and we talked a bit less awkward. I asked him about his job, I told him about Mya and my mom's promise in my birthday, he promised to try and come visit more regularly and asked me to think if I wanted to spend a part of the summer with him and told me that if my mom didn't keep her promise to ask him for help.

Not going to lie, feeling like my dad wants to make things right made me happy but only time will tell. He accompanied me to my car and we used his umbrella because it stared raining while we talked inside, he hugged me again before saying good bye.

In my car I already had texts from Mya and Daniel asking me how it went, I decided to respond now so they wouldn't be intrigued longer and it took me more than I thought because Mya ended up calling me wanting to know every detail about the kiss and Megan.

*****

When I was opening the front door I heard my mom crying really loud, I put my bag on a sofa and followed the noise to the kitchen. She was sitting on the floor holding an almost empty bottle of wine "Mom?" She looked up to me "Where have you been?" She asked "At the gym" I responded "You're lying" I was so confused "What do you mean?" She threw the bottle at me but I dodged it and it shattered in the wall next to me, some pieces of the glass burying in my cheek.

"You were with your father! You liar" She said as I went to the guest bath room to clean my face "You always loved him more! You liar! You are going to replace me!" She screamed as she followed me to the bathroom. I closed the door taking deep breaths. The wound wasn't too bad because the piece of glass wasn't too big.

"You're so ungrateful! I do everything for you! And you go and meet with him!" She kept screaming from the other side of the door. I finished cleaning the little bit of blood from my face and then opened the window as quiet as I could and left the house.

Why was this happening to me again? I didn't care that I was wearing sweatpants and a t-shirt I started running. I had no idea where I was going, I didn't care about the cold in my arms or the raindrops hitting my face I just kept running until a stupid tree branch made lose my balance and I felt in the front yard of a house.