Tom Holland is a Liar: T.H x Reader

Chapter 8

He gave me a sweet smile and my knees went weak. He always had it over me, he held his dashing grin like an achievement. People with smiles like his could get away with murder, he could get away with anything. I was supposed to hate him, I was supposed to curse the ground he walked on-to riddle detest under my breath in his presence yet every second more I'm with him the less I take back my unforgiving manner. I did want to forgive him. I really, really did-probably because I was stupid but at least I'd be stupid getting to look at that smile some more.

"Should I stay the night?" he asks me. 

I pondered the question-i thought that was a given, whether he'd want to spend it with me though I only wished. Maybe I'd hold some sort of power of him, a dominance over his feelings. I answered him vague leaving the decision mostly on himself,"only if you wish."

"And should I wish?"

"That's for you to decide," I thought of it for only a second I swear, but I hope he wished it. I begged he would. 

His eyes shift to Harrison's state on the couch,"Well..I shouldn't leave Haz like this..so. I suppose." He replied in uncertainty, I was uncertain myself but the good kind. The risky kind.

I only nodded and went under the sheets I had laid out on the floor for myself. Tom stood uncomfortable or rather unsure, it stood as he didn't know himself where to lie. I could offer a spot-spare him from his insecure shame but I enjoyed his frazzled state even if he did so well to conceal I knew his mind raced to form a decision. He couldn't take the couch and the only blankets were the one I used. I wanted to shake him up some more so I spoke up.

"Aren't you getting to bed then?" I ask with a hidden smirk, his unsureness in my favour. 

He stumbles,"uh..yeah-yeh just uh where should I....?" He fumbled.

"Anywhere," I was just egging him on now.

"Yeah," he says still hesitant,"Are there-uh, blankets?"

I pulled the top sheet off of me,"Take this one, it's all that's left."

He quickly goes in defence, all of a sudden the boy went polite-it was unlikely. Especially this demeanour when with me,"You don't have to do that. You keep it, you should have both."

"I don't need both," I protest.

"keep it!"

It was like an annoying game of back and forth . 

"Don't be a wanker Tom just take it!" I object overtly.

He smiles,"what if I slept next to you?"

"What if? Are we working in hypotheticals now?" I was an arrogant asshole but I was using it just to make his words more difficult. I wanted to him to fumble I enjoyed him doing so.

"What if y/n, just what if?"

"And what if I punched you in the face, what if I bit your hand off, what if-"he cut me off in a hyper-fixated statement.

"What. If. That's all y/n just what if," he says, he coming towards me now crouching right in from of me. Less than arms length away yet seemingly not close enough, I could so easily grab his shirt and pull towards me. Specifically towards my lips, his calloused lips. I thought, I really did. 

I whispered my next phrase because I was too ashamed of my pride to hear it, even worse if my dignity and integrity over heard the aloof words I dare say,"Tom...my cheek, kiss my cheek."

He didn't even question it, he just did. Thank God he didn't question-i wouldn't know to answer, I don't think I even would. He kissed it slow, my eyes closed at the touch and my breath shuttered at the physical break. I knew he could feel my nerves, I almost wanted him to know how hard I was trying to be easy with him. How hard I tried to be like him. My eyes open as he pulls away, my cheek left an imprint of his lips I had to even touch the spot with my hand. I don't why I asked him to do that. 

"Was that bad?" he asked.

"Yes, it was," I say in a lie and he knew. He knew when I lied because he was a such a good liar himself he could see another coming from a mile away. But still he didn't question. 

"What do you need y/n? From me? What is it you need from me?"

"Trust," I say instantly. I needed his trust I needed him to guarantee it. 

I knew he couldn't but that still didn't make me hesitant. I didn't even let him answer before I put my palm on his cheek. An action so intimate it felt more real than sex. He was off put but didn't persist. I had no more moves, I didn't even move my hand it just stayed put-in place waiting for nothing. He looked at me. He looked. His lips spoke words without a sound coming from his mouth I never missed him more than this moment and he's only an inch away. 

I had to speak, I had to,"You're an asshole Tom." I paused but never regretted my words,"the biggest asshole I've ever met," he nods because he knew I was lying and I was. I was lying right to his face yet he heard the truth anyway,"I never wanna' see you again."

That was his go-too quickly for me to even process he takes the hand by his cheek, he kisses it delicately. It was odd, he's never done that before-i've never met anyone who has. I figured it was a medieval gesture but I part take anyway. 

"How badly did I do darling?" he asks sincere, it never occurred to me that he never knew. Sure I wasn't discreet with my hate towards him and I was certain he knew he'd done wrong but he didn't know how bad. How could he?

I was scared-terrified honestly,"The worst. You were the worst."

"And now? Why now?"

"I don't know," I say-i never ever knew anything.

I didn't kiss him, not yet. I rested my head on his chest leaning forward until hit his presence, his arms rest around me. They lay stiff. 

"sorry y/n. I'm...sorry."

Right there in his arms I forgave him instantly but in all honesty I think he already was.