[HIATUS]dear wooyoung |woosan & sansang|

t w o

word count: 1103

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dear wooyoung,

there isn't a single day when i don't think about that kiss.

the world around us was freezing cold but for some reason, at the moment, i was burning up.  it's been a week since you kissed me and i still haven't seen you. 

i miss you. a lot.

one of my friends, yeosang, noticed that i was feeling depressed and offered to take to a festival being held in our town.  i declined but it seemed like he wasn't taking no for an answer.  with a heavy heart, i got ready for the day.

almost immediately after i'm done, i hear the resounding sound of a doorbell echoing through my apartment.  i expect it to be yeosang so i swung the door open, not bothering to check who was behind it.

it wasn't yeosang.  it was you.

you gave me a small, awkward wave and proceed to ask if we could talk. i nodded, not feeling like i was up to using my voice.  i didn't trust myself to because i knew if i did, i would either say something stupid or ugly little voice cracks would start falling out of my mouth.

i moved aside for you to come in and gestured for you to sit on the coach.  still not speaking, i looked at you expectantly to let you know that you could continue to say what you wanted to say.

you inhaled deeply and told me something along the lines of "i know things have been kind of awkward because of what happened and i'm sorry.  i didn't mean to kiss you it just kind of happened.  can we just pretend like this never happened and go back to the way things used to be?  i miss my bestfriend.", you teared a little bit up at the end.

bestfriend

that's right.  that's all we were and all we'll ever be.  my breath became shaky and i could feel myself about to cry.  i slowly nodded my head, avoiding your gaze at all times.  my thoughts seemed to be racing at a million miles per hour but stopped once your sweet voice reached my ears.

still sniffling, you said, "could you please use your words.  i feel like you don't really mean it if you say nothing."

i looked up, and saw your broken expression.  my heart fluttered a bit because i never knew i had this affect on you.  i was a bit happy but i reframed myself from feeling this way because of the current situation.

"y-yeah.  i m-miss you to-oo." i was soon pushed back onto the coach and engulfed in a long hug.  your hugs were always the best.  it's fine if we can't be together in that way.  at least i'll have you by my side.  that's all i'll ever need.

a few tears manage to escape my face but you don't notice, too busy with the hug.  i'm really glad you didn't because i would rather avoid making things more awkward.

the doorbell rang again so i quickly wiped my tears and opened the door.  i was face to face with yeosang.  "are you okay?", he asks rubbing my cheek with his hand.  "you've been crying." he pouts.

i smile and say that i'm fine.  yeosang has always been a good friend.  we've been with each other through thick and thin.

he gives me an unconvinced look but senses that i don't wanna talk about it.  he gives me a look that probably meant 'we'll talk about it later ' and proceeds to fix a few loose strands of my hair that had gotten messy from my previous hug with you.

"so", yeosang begins, "ready to go?"

i nod my head rapidly and flash him a big smile.  although i dreaded going before, i feel a lot better now and am actually pretty excited to go.  

you suddenly come from behind me and greet yeosang, asking who he was.

"wooyoung, this is yeosang.  yeosang, this is wooyoung." you both exchanged greetings and shake hands.

"we were just about to head to the festival.", yeosang informs you.

"oh! so am i!", you reply excitedly. "i'm going with my boyfriend."

boyfriend

"oh. i didn't know you had one.", i reply looking down.  i hated that fact that you had a boyfriend. i hated the fact that you didn't tell me sooner.  i hated the fact that i couldn't just pretend like the kiss never happened like you asked me to. and mostly, i hated the fact that it wasn't me.

"you remember the guy from the café, the barista?" in nodded,  "well we sort of exchanged numbers and started talking and...i don't know, things kind of just happened.", you said, small smile on your face.  i wish you would talk about me with that type of smile.  you looked happy.

reading the situation, yeosang took hold of my hand and pulled me towards him.  "well, we'd better get going.  i wanna go on as many rides as possible.", he said in a cheery voice.  

i closed the door behind me.  we exchanged a few goodbyes and went our separate ways.  once we reach yeosang's car, i give him a skeptical look.  "what's wrong with you? you hate rides.  you'd sell your liver before you'd ever go on a ride." he gives me a light nod. "yeah, but i also hate watching one of my closest friends be uncomfortable. you're not out of the woods yet.  we still have to talk about this later.  for now, let's just focus on cheering you up." his eyes focus on the road ahead and i play with his other, unoccupied, hand as a distraction. "ok."

it's at times like these when i'm really happy to have yeosang in my life.  he's a really good person.

we finally reached the festival and i spent the whole time praying for us not to run into you and your boyfriend.  if i ignore the content anxious thoughts of you, the festival was actually really fun.

but as expected, the world hates me and decided to torment me in the worse way possible.  i see a familiar looking guy walk past us.  i don't realize why he looks so familiar until he runs across the street and jump into your arms.  

i know i said that it would be fine if we weren't together as long as we could still be friends but i don't know if i feel the same way anymore.  i'm glad you're happy but watching his hurts way too much.

i grab hold of a confused yeosang's hand and try to speed walk myself out of the awkward situation that was to come but, as always, the world had different plans.

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yee yee🤠🤡