Whisper

[Five]

Jordan has always told me that I'm a good actress. I would always get my way by simply forcing myself to cry. I could also mislead people into thinking that I was really happy, when in reality I wasn't happy at all.

This is one of those times when my supposedly great acting skills are coming in handy. Well, they've come in handy these past two weeks actually.

It's been a hectic two weeks around here. After her body was discovered and the authorities were called, our house has been constantly filled with police, detectives, forensics teams, lawyers and a whole lot of media.

I got really sick of it after the first couple of days. We didn't get any privacy, and I was asked the same questions repeatedly every day. Of course I had to pretend that I was completely distraught over her murder. I guess it helped that having all these police and detectives around made me nervous.

I was worried that they would discover that I'm the murderer, so my voice was really shaky. Which I was hoping they would perceive as grief, not guilt. All I had to do was constantly make myself cry, which although effective, was incredibly tiring, and act distant towards everyone. Which also was not difficult to do, considering the fact that I didn't want to talk to them anyway.

I spent most of my time in my bedroom talking to Jordan. He didn't want anything to do with the people downstairs, so he just hid in my room.

When I was downstairs, though, I enjoyed seeing the devastation on the faces of my family members. Especially my younger sister.

Due to the fact that she was the one who found her, Lucy was constantly being interviewed and forced to describe what she saw numerous times. Having to include every single minuscule detail that she could recall. Which meant that she was reliving the moment over and over again.

We have only just gotten back from the funeral. We would have held it earlier, but the medical examiner wasn't finished with her body until two days ago. They had scoured every inch of her body, inside and out, to search for any clues. They found the hair in her wounds and sent it off to evidence. That would definitely make sure that I wasn't caught. The hair wasn't mine.

They had also searched our bathroom top to bottom. The insanely bright flashes of their camera's were blinding. They took pictures of everything. The blood splatters on the walls and floor. The bathtub had been emptied after they had discovered that there wasn't anything but a knife and her body in there, besides the doll parts. 

The only time I saw Jordan out of my bedroom was when he was watching the forensics team do their job. He has a fascination with blood and all those types of things. Too many crime shows I think. Once they were gone, he went in and got a closer look at everything. The grin he was wearing threatened to split his face. 

The crime scene tape is still blocking off the door and as I stand here looking in there, I can't help but allow myself another small smirk of satisfaction. I had succeeded, and I was almost certain that they wouldn't ever know that it was me.

Our house was filled with mourners wearing black clothes. It was horribly bland and crowded. The only good thing about it was that there was actually food being passed around. I haven't eaten properly since I killed her, and it's not because I was upset or feeling guilty.

It was all part of the act. I haven't known many people who are grieving the death of a close family member to stuff their faces with food. I know that when my real family died, I didn't eat for weeks. So I would have to wait until everyone went to bed and sneak down to the kitchen and make myself a sandwich or something. Not the most satisfying thing to eat every night for two weeks.

At the funeral I didn't even have to force myself to cry towards the end. It wasn't because I missed Jennifer, or regret what I have done, but it reminded me of my real family's funeral. When I had to bury my mother, father and twin brother. It was the most difficult and heart wrenching day of my life.