moonlight | ninjago

08 ✧ heart to heart

"'cause i've been trying way too long
to try and be the perfect song
when our hearts are heavy burdens
we shouldn't have to bear alone."
✧✧✧

Another week goes by, this time spent with Jay. As sweet as he is, his energy proves to be a bit much for Kira, and on top of that, she's shown little mercy during training. She quickly loses count of how many times she messes up a kata, makes a stupid mistake and hurts herself, or generally just wants to roll over and die.

Is it just me, or does this get harder every day? she wonders to herself.

Needless to say, her energy is sapped by the end of the week.

Late Saturday night, Kira groans and rolls over in bed yet again. Her body still aches from that week's training, and on top of that, her bed feels strangely uncomfortable tonight—the covers don't feel quite right, and the pillows hold no warmth, or maybe they're too warm even though the room is cold. Whatever the case, the combination makes going to bed impossible. The girl huffs and shifts again, this time moving to face her bedroom window. Her eyes immediately lock on the full moon glowing outside. There's a pang in her heart, a tug at her brain, an itch to move closer.

She's out of bed before she knows it.

Kira slides on her shoes and creeps from the room, moving through the Monastery halls and stealing through the doors. Crisp nighttime air pierces her skin as she jogs through the courtyard, but she pays it no mind. She keeps going, spinning on her heel halfway across and rushing in the other direction. Her leg muscles bunch and her eyes narrow as she attempts to time her jump just right. She leaps. She misses the roof, but her fingertips latch onto the edge, and she uses the leverage to pull herself up and over. She squeaks as a few tiles on the roof shift, hoping they won't fall and send her with them. To her relief, nothing happens.

Kira takes a breath before taking in her surroundings. Before her, the sky expands in an endless stretch of midnight, and below her sits a sea of fluffy clouds. The stars lean down to kiss her from high above, twinkling like diamonds, and the moon shines full and bright. It's beautiful, almost hauntingly so, like she's wandered into a dream. An awed breath escapes her as she sits down, legs dangling over the edge of the roof.

For the first time in a while, Kira remembers how relaxing it is to forget everything and be alone with her thoughts. Since she moved in, her life has been an endless cycle of train, eat, sleep, and repeat, and the weekends off go by quickly. It makes part of her miss the leisure of Jamanakai. Sure, her life wasn't that interesting, but at least it wasn't stressful. Back there, her greatest challenges were home school and tending to the tea shop, not learning how to become a warrior. Nobody expected anything of her. She wasn't pushed to do things she never imagined doing before. She didn't have to worry about being someone she wasn't: a ninja, strong and brave, heroic and powerful.

She was just Kira.

Everything is different now. And as hard as she's been trying to adjust, she's still not fully used to it.

The Monastery is lovely, but it's not her home. The people she lives with are nice, but she still doesn't know them well and vice versa. How does she go about changing that? How in Ninjago is she even supposed to make real friends, let alone keep them? The others are all so kind, but no matter what she does, it feels impossible to break free of her shell.

How is it that even surrounded by other people, I still feel alone?

Her eyes search the night sky, like the answer is hidden somewhere in the stars, waiting to be revealed in the moonlight. When she fails to find it, she resorts to talking instead.