The Elephant in the Room

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Hi there, hope you're all keeping well in these days of pestilence. While you're hunkered down in your plague shelter waiting for rescue, why not read this from the before-times.

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For some time, Jade had had a recurring dream. She's sitting at the edge of a lake - the lake is vast, the other side lost in mist, and yet its waters are smooth. Idly, she picks a lily and drops it onto the surface, and watches as the ripples spread out, until they dissipate and the water is once again perfectly still.

Only it isn't. Somewhere there's a current, because as she watches the lily begins to move, slowly, away from her, and she makes a note to catch it, to retrieve it before it goes too far, before it's lost. But just as she goes to pluck it from the water, there is a distraction - the sound of a bird, the rumble of thunder, childish laughter - and when she looks back the lily has crossed that invisible boundary and is now out of reach, and all she can do is sit and watch as it drifts further and further away, visible and yet lost forever.

Man, what she wouldn't give to be having that dream right now, instead of the god-awful horror show that assailed her every night.

Tori and Ted. Tori with Ted. Tori and Ted holding hands. Tori and Ted making out. Tori skipping naked through fields of golden wheat, pursued by a laughing Ted sporting a boner the size of a baseball bat. Sometimes she found herself a disembodied presence, floating above the bed, watching Ted's ass humping up and down with a terrible determination as Tori writhed and squealed below, looking up at her over his shoulder, fixing Jade with a grin and a knowing wink.

I was worth waiting for.

Her gut writhed as she hung there, wordless and impotent, unable to intervene, or even to look away.

And all the time she could feel it, a trail of hot fire branded on the inside of her leg, like the mark of Cain.

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So," Tori said excitedly, the following day, "what do you think?"

Jade was in no mood for this, after a restless and increasingly frustrating night. "About what?"

"Ted."

"What about him?"

"What did you think?"

"About what?"

"About Ted."

"What about him?"

"What did you think?"

"About what?"

"Jade!"

"I dunno. He was fine, I guess."

"fine?"

"Well, what do you want me to say?" Jade said, irritably. "He's just a guy. They're all the same."

There was a long and uncomfortable silence.

"I'm right here, you know," Beck said from across the table. Jade rolled her eyes.

"Okay, apart from Beck, they're all the same."

"Ahem."

"All right, apart from Beck and Andre, they're-"

"Er…"

"Jesus. Okay, fine. Apart from Beck, and Andre and Robbie-"

"And me!"

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