Surviving Without Him

Time.

*Taylor's POV*

"Alex! Be careful!" I yelled when I saw her walking into the living room, "you're not supposed to walk by yourself without crutches!"

I had just gotten home from the grocery store and this was not what I wanted to see.

"Mom, I can do it! I'm fine." She says as she bites her lip to hide the pain.

"Alex, your not gonna be able to walk for a while. You're gonna make it worse if you keep trying to walk like this." I said walking over to her and letting her completely lean on me. She sighed and let me lead her to the couch.

After she sat down, I carried the groceries into the kitchen where Selena and Bentley were sitting, "Hey taylor."

I smiled over at them and unloaded the food, "Are you guys hungry?"

"Yea." Bentley says looking up from their card game.

"Mac and cheese?" They both nod so I began cooking and thinking.

The funeral was in two days. We had been planning whenever we could for about a week. It was everything I thought Harry would want.

A bunch of our friends and family were gonna be there and we had someone who was going to perform Free Falling by John Mayer. It was his favorite.

I was so nervous and sad and overwhelmed. I still couldn't believe that he was gone. Everyday I wake up and expect to see Harry laying next to me, but he's never there. It kills me a little bit.

I hate that my kids won't have a father. The baby in my stomach will never have a father. I hate that.

I sighed slightly and continued cooking. By the time I finished, Selena and Bentley had finished the game they were playing and had started a new one. I brought two bowls of Mac and cheese over to them.

"Mom, can I have a fork instead of a spoon?" Bentley asked frowning at the spoon.

"Oh yea. I forgot you and Alex like forks." I said taking the spoon back and handing him a fork. I grabbed my own plate and sat next to them while they played.

I was thankful for the little distractions like these. I needed them. Without them I don't know where we'd be. Watching them laugh and be as happy as they could makes me happy.

I wish Alex was in here too. I knew she was having an especially hard time with all this. She hated admitting her feelings too so it was double the pain. I just hoped she'd be okay again soon.

I'm seriously debating bringing her in for therapy. I'll have to ask her what she'd think about it. Obviously she won't really want to, but I'm so scared she'll become depressed or start harming herself. I know she's strong, but I'm still worried.

After I finished eating, I stood up and walked into the living room where Alex was, "Hey sweetie."

"Hey mom." she says half smiling at me. I sat down next to her and put my arm around her.

"How are you feeling?"

She shrugs and looks up at me with tears in her eyes, "I'm not ready for his funeral."

"Me neither."

She leans her head onto my shoulder and cries slightly. I hugged her tighter and whispered soothing things in her ear.

After she finished crying, she put her head in my lap and fell asleep.

At least she was sleeping now.

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A.N.

Sorry I haven't posted in a while and it's short....
Next chapter will be a slight time jump and hopefully the chapters will be longer.

Anyways, hope you liked it!