Until we meet again (A war romance) (#Wattys2015)

Part 13 - Diana

I hadn’t heard from Matthew for weeks, and I was becoming increasingly worried about him. What if something had happened to him while he was on his way back? I didn’t dare to think about it, as that would lead to nightmares about it, which- even though I would try to avoid- would come for me and hunt me down. I was prey to these nightmares, as was everyone else in the village. But I was sure these nightmares, as horrible as they were, were nothing compared to what Matthew dreamt about.

One day in December, while the frost clung to my clothes, and my fingers were frozen, I headed down to the farm to begin work. Mother still wouldn’t get out of her chair to work, but seemed quite happy to spend my money on pleasures for herself! We had many fights together about how it was my money, and she had no right to spend it! Secretly, I was saving for a house, so I could move out and do what I bloody well wanted! I’d had enough of Mother. After that, Matthew and I could settle down together, and finally get married!

I knocked on the door, my hands shaking with cold. I really needed some gloves. Oh well I thought, Christmas is here soon, maybe I’ll get a pair then… No one answered, so I knocked again, hard this time. “Hello?” I called, my teeth chattering, “Suzie? It’s Di!” Just at that moment, the door opened, and Suzie beamed at me. Her eyes sparkled with a gleam that I hadn’t seen since…

“He’s- he’s back?” I asked, suddenly forgetting how cold I was. Suzie nodded happily, laughing. I could see the tears in her eyes as she did so. I pushed past her then, without hesitation, leaving her to let nothing more in but a drought. I raced up the stairs as if they were a flat surface, and pushed open the bedroom door…

“Matthew…” I stopped when I saw them. It wasn’t just Matthew there. There was also a pretty young lady, about my age, (maybe younger) sitting on the side of his bed. She was rather too close to him for my liking- their noses were practically touching! When I entered, they both looked up, shocked.

“Can I help you?” The woman asked sweetly, with a French accent.

“I need to see Matthew,” I said,

“Who are you?” She eyed me up and down as she said this, looking as if wanting to disapprove of something about me. I didn’t like her already, so I gave her something to disapprove of. I glared at her.

“I’m his girlfriend, if you must know!”

“Oh!” The woman blushed suddenly, and shrank back. I smirked triumphantly. The woman hurried from the room, and I turned back to Matthew. His face was red and blistered, and he had a few cuts on his lips and cheeks. His leg was heavily bandaged, but I could see the blood from the other side of the room.

“Matthew?” I whispered. This wasn’t him. This couldn’t be him. He’d been gone four months and he’s changed so much. His delicate, masculine features had been taken and changed into…

I was across the room now, and by his bed. I reached out to his face, and held his cheek. He winced, and I withdrew my hand.

“Sorry,” I said. Before I had been so excited, but now it was like the words had dissolved in my mind.

“I know,” Matthew shrugged sadly. I had forgotten he could see how disappointed my face was. I tried to smile.

“You don’t have to smile, Di, I know what I look like.”

“Are you- ok?”

“He died in front of me, Di, in front of my eyes. I just- he wasn’t even old enough to be there, Di. It’s just- what if I had told the officer how old he was? He would have hated me, but he would be safe and- alive.”

I gasped. Will.

“It’s ok,” I put my hand on his shoulder, “There was nothing you could have done, Matthew. If they couldn’t tell he was too young, that was their fault.”

“He was protecting his dad! It’s more than I’ve done! I haven’t seen or heard from my dad since we went over the top, or Pete!”

I let out a sob then, just one.

“What is it?” Matthew asked.

“I just- feel so helpless. I couldn’t have helped you, but I still feel like it’s my fault. Here, they’re all saying it’ll be an adventure, but then…”

“I’ve come home,” Matthew said, “And I’m alive, ok?”

“I know, oh! I should be looking after you, not the other way round! I’m just glad it’ll all be over soon!”

“What?”

“Christmas…”

He laughed then. It was harsh and sarcastic, “Do you really believe that? Di, if it was going to be over by Christmas, all the others would be coming back now. It’s just because I’m useless that they’ve sent me back!”

“Hey,” I said, “You’re not useless,”

“But what can I be that Dad and Pete aren’t?”

“Mine.” I kissed him then, and it was as if nothing had changed, and then we were back in the dreary room, where I was about to break the bad news.

“Matthew, there’s something you need to know about Pete.”

“What?”

“He….” I closed my eyes. I didn’t want to see his face. “He’s dead.”

There was a long, painful silence. I eventually opened my eyes, and I wished I hadn’t. His eyes were full of pain, and hurt.

“Am I really that ugly to look at?” he said quietly.

“What?!” I shouted, embarrassed, “You’re brother is dead!”

“I KNOW WHAT YOU SAID!” he screamed suddenly, then he broke down and wept. I wrapped my arms around him.

“It wasn’t supposed to be him!” he cried.

“Ssshhh,” I whispered. This wasn’t Matthew. This was an empty shell wearing his skin.

Just then, the French lady was at the door, her eyes fixed on Matthew.

“What did you say to him?” she said, pushing me out the way. I gave her a disgusted look.

“His brother’s dead, did you expect him to laugh?” I asked bitterly.

“There are better moments to break things like this to him,” the woman snapped.

“Who are you?” I asked.

The woman glared, “I’m his nurse. I’m staying here until he gets better, and I’m taking him back again.

“You can’t take him back, look at him!” I shouted, and Matthew sobbed.

“I just have orders, I follow them,” The nurse shrugged with a glare. I turned to leave. “I’ll be visiting again tomorrow. You had better not be here when I am.” I said.

“Was that a threat?”

“Yes.” I smiled, and walked out of the room, out of the house, all the way home. Only when I reached the front door did I scream and cry, and hate this new French woman!

 

 ***

Author's note:

Ohhhhh, jealous! haha

Thanks for all the support! can we try and get up to 80 views by the end of the week? That would be awesome, and would really make my day! I would't have even got this far without you guys reading this! thanks, I really appreciate it!! :)

This dedication, is once again, to Chloedra!

Thanks Xxx
Read, vote, comment!