32 – Gone
Just like what I did in the past few days, I cried and cried my heart out. Nang makapasok ako sa kotse ay agad na sumunod si Faye sa loob hila-hila si Amethyst na may tama na. She drove us home, Am slept in the backseat while I cried.
I couldn't understand what he said. I couldn't understand why he can't explain what happened. Hindi ko maisip ang posibleng dahilan kung bakit niya iyon ginawa. Probably because of alcohol. Kung ano man ang dahilan bakit napunta kay Danica ang kuwintas ko ay wala na akong pakialam. Maybe Ayden gave it to her. Baka kaya nawala iyon sa kwarto ko ay kinuha niya nang umagang pinapasok siya ni Ate Tessy.
Nang makauwi nang gabing iyon ay hinang-hina ako. Hindi ko na natulungan si Faye na buhatin si Amethyst. Good thing Ate Pia was still awake.
"Back to black, Amethyst."
I sat down my chair in front of the mirror. Nagkibit-balikat lang si Am habang kinukulayan pa rin ang buhok ni Faye. This is one of the nights when they will sleep over my room. Kagabi ay dito na sila natulog. They didn't want to go home.
"You sure? Bagay ang blonde sa 'yo."
I rolled my eyes and stared at myself in the mirror. I used to like it. I don't like it now. Siguro naman ay alam niya ang rason kung bakit gusto kong ipabalik ang buhok ko sa dati. Going blonde wasn't the best idea. I regret it.
"I prefer her natural color. Raven black.." it was Faye.
Tumango na lang si Amethyst. Wala akong ibang ginawa kung hindi manood na lamang ng videos habang naghihintay. Nang ako na ang sumunod ay inihagis ko ang cellphone ko sa kama. I want to get over this look. Gusto na lang ibalik ang dati kahit na nagustuhan ko pa ito noong umpisa.
"You're going to continue modeling, Asia, right?"
I shrugged. "Yeah. I think so."
Tumango si Faye saka bumaling kay Amethyst. "You sure with dentistry, Am?"
Amethyst rolled her eyes. "Of course, duh!"
"You sure with film, Faye?" Tanong ko.
"Of course, duh!" She imitated Am.
Tumawa ako bago bumaling ulit sa salamin. Amethyst tried to even kick her leg. Nang makita ang unti-unting pagbabago ng buhok ko ay nakaramdam ako ng kirot sa dibdib ko. He said I looked good in blonde. Was he lying to when he said that?
"He's going to Australia for college." Biglang sabi ni Amethyst.
"Sigurado na ba iyon, Am?"
Hindi ko sila tinignan. I continued staring at myself in the mirror. Sana nga ay totoo na iyon nang hindi na kami magkita pa. He should follow his mom's order.
"Ang sabi sa akin ni Daniel, sigurado na raw."
Kinagat ko ang labi ko. I know I want him to leave. Pero hanggang doon na lang ba iyon? Bago ba siya umalis ay maipaliliwanag niya sa akin ang nangyari? O aalis na lang siya basta habang naguguluhan pa rin ako sa mga bagay na resposibilidad niyang ipaliwanag sa akin?
What's the point of explaining, anyway? Kailangan ko pa ba no'n? I saw it with my own eyes. Explanation isn't needed anymore.
"Kakausapin mo man lang ba bago umalis, Asia?"
I didn't look at Faye. "No."
Amethyst sighed. "Kausapin mo naman kahit saglit lang. You two need that."
I shrugged. "Well, I don't need it.'
Bumaling si Faye kay Am at nagtaas ng kilay. Amethyst shook her head and sadly smiled. Hindi ko na iyon pinansin at nagpatuloy na lang sa pagmamasid sa buhok ko. There's so many blonde girls in Australia, for sure! Malunod at magsawa siya sa mga babae ro'n!
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