Astra

Chapter 2

Chapter 2: Comfort Zone

Uwian na, We are still waiting for Zander,sya ung pinaka last na mag-out saming 10 eh

Yakap yakap pa rin ako ni Cassie
Ok na ko
Maya maya pa dumating na si Zander
"Tara?"yaya nya agad
"Tara"sabi ko

"Sabay!"sabi saakin ni Zander
Agad na kumunot ang noo ko
"Why?"I asked
"Paalam Kita"sabi ni Zander

"Wag na Zand,kayo nalang muna,wag na nating salubungin init ng ulo ni mom"sabi ko
Ngumuso naman ung 9

"Next time,I promise"sabi ko
"But this time, I'm gonna settle my mess"dagdag ko pa

Napatango nalang sila
Bago pa man ako makasakay sa kotse namin
They hugged me once a again
I hugged them too
"Calls us when you need someone to listen to you later ok?"sabi nila
Tumango ako

Agad na kong sumakay sa kotse and binaba ko ang window and I waved at them with a smile on my lips,
After this, wala na kong smile na mailalabas,
Tears of madness instead

Gusto kong pabagalan ang pagtakbo ng sasakyan pero arghhhh!

Agad kaning nakarating sa bahay
Nakita ko na andoon na ung Family Car namin
And it means andoon na sila mom and dad.
Bago ako bumaba sa kotse
Hinanda ko muna ang sarili,tenga,katawan at puso sa ano man ang mangyayari

Warning:Words,

Agad na kong bumaba sa kotse
At pumasok sa bahay,
Nakita ko si mom and dad sa sala
They are watching tv
Mom stare focus on me,

Kahit na kinakabahan,
Lumapit pa rin ako't nagmano,
Pumunta ako sa kwarto ko

Nagbihis na ko ng pambahay,
I get my phone

I received 10 unread messages

From:Amber
You fine bunso?

From:Zander
Bunso,call me when you need me I'll be there in just a seconds to pick you up.

From:Cassie
Should I pick you?and make some reason?

From:Akiela
I'm worried bunso.You ok?

From: Steven
Bunso!cheer up! Tulog ka nalang agad para di ka mapagalitan

From:Alisha
Bunso, Were worried

From:Maika
Bunso?

From:Christel
Bunso,susunduin na ba kita?

From: August
Bunso, Sinasaktan ka ba nila?

From: Misty
Bunso? what's happening?Are you good?

Sinabi ba nila Misty yon?

Isa isa ko silang sinagot
Puro,No need,No, I'm ok, I'm fine,ganyan lang HAHAHA

Am I fine?no
I just went to my Facebook
And scroll up and down and sharing some post

And after that I went to twitter

"Let's get ready," and then I tweet it.

Maya maya pa,

"Miss Astra,"tawag saakin sa labas
Pinagbuksan ko sya ng pinto
Wahhh it's Ate Kate
Ate Kate is one of our maid
She's 25 y/o
I'm closed with her

"Pinapatawag ka na Miss, Galit sila"sabi nya

"Thanks for the informing me ate Kate,"sabi ko
Kahit na alam ko namn na

"Anong nangyari?"tanong nya
"Kabobohan ko"sabi ko
"Hindi ka bobo Astra, walang taong bobo"sabi nya

I just shrugged my shoulders
And I went Outside and I close the door of my room,
Pagkababa ko asa dining na sila
Umupo ako sa may tapat ni Mom

"Wow,shekinah has a good grade huh, nice"Mom said

It's starting
"Ikaw kaya Astra?kailan ka makakakuha ng Matataas na grado?"tanong Ni Mom
"I'm trying my best Mom"Sabi ko
"Shush, stop that lame excuses"sabi nya
"I'm not making any excuses mom"sagot ko
She frowned

"Alam mo ng sumagot ngaun ha?!"sabi ni mom
Hindi ako sumasagot dati,
Pero ngaun lang ako sumagot,
I'm just defending myself,
I want them to hear my side.

"Bakit?kaya mo ng patunayan na kaya mo ng buhayin ang sarili mo?! Ha Astra?! Umaasa ka palang saamin!"sabi ni mom

"You keep on disappointing me!Antanga tanga mo Astra,wala kang kwenta! Ang bobo mo! Puro nalng kabobohan at katangahan ang nagagawa mo!"mom said

My heart ached once again
Oo na,bobo na ko,
Ako na tanga,
Ako na ang walang kwentang Anak,

"Bat di mo gayahin ung pinsan mo?! Ang galing galing,ikaw bobo!walang alam!tatanga tanga!"sabi saakin ni mom

Nakalimutan kong sabihin
Kumakain pala kami

Nakayuko Lang ako at pilit na ngumunguya't lumulunok,
It's hard to swallow the food
Why?bec. It's just like I'm swallong the words they're throwing at me

"Wala kang kwenta!"sabi ni mom at bigla nyang tinulak ang noo at dahil don medyo napaatras ako

"Tama na yan!"sabi ni dad
"Bwisit!"sabi ni mom

Nang nararamdaman ko na ang luha ko
Agad kong binilisan kumain,
I don't want them to see me crying,

Agad akong inabutan ng tubig ni ate Kate

Nagpaalam ako sa kanila
"Mom,Dad, I'm going to my room na po" pinipilit kong wag pumiyok o manginig ang boses ko

Tumango nalng si dad
Patakbo ang umakyat sa kwarto ko

Pagkarating ko sa kwarto ko
I didn't switch on the lights
I'm silently crying inside of my room that filled by darkness
Ahh my comfort zone

For real, mas masakit ang umiyak ng walang tunog habang nasa dilim,
Btch! I really hate myself!
I hate myself for aiming too much expectations!

I wiped my tears and calm myself when someone is calling on my phone
I get my phone and see who's the caller

Oh it's Zander
I answer it
Tumikhim muna ko bago magsalita

"Hello?"tanong ko
"Bunso"tawag nya
"Hmm?"tanong ko

"Are you ok?"tanong nya
And by that question,
I started crying again
"Oh sht!"sabi ni Zander

"No, I'm not ok Zander,"Sabi ko
"Should I go there?"tanong ni Zander
"No need Zander, It's just,I need someone who'll listen for me right now"sabi ko
"Me and Akiela and others, we're free to listen bunso"sabi nya

Napangiti ako
"It's just a word but it Can kill me"sabi ko
"Go on"sabi nila
"And their expectations are that high for me to aim it, I'm weak, I'm a loser, I'm a failure"sabi ko

"Bunso,listen you're not a loser, you're not Weak and most of all you're not a failure"sabi ni Cassie

"You're stronger than us Bunso,kase I really salute you,even if your heart filled with sadness and madness hindi ka nagrerebelde,mas pinag-iigihan mo pang maging matatag kahit na ansakit sakit na"sabi ni Akiela

"Bunso,konting tiis nalang,konti nalang, maabot mo na Ang pangarap mo"sabi ni Steven.

"Thank you for spending your time to listen to me my ate's and Kuya's "sabi ko
"No worries bunso,just call us when you need us ok?"tanong ni Maika

"Noted,"sabi ko
"Now,go and rest na, goodnight Bunso"sabi nila
"Good night everyone"sabi ko
"Labyuu"habol ko pa
"Labyuu too"sabay sabay nilang sabi

Napangiti ako't binaba na ang tawag.

My friends are one of my comfort zone
And also
Darkness, it is one of my comfort zone.

When I close my eyes,
My last tears for tonight went down
Now I'm free from the madness that I felt for tonight.
Madness not pain.
And after that,
Nakatulog na ko.

End of the Chapter 2:

There's a euphoric feeling right after when you know that there's someone who's willing to listen at your problems in life without any judgement.

Keep safe everyone
God bless.
DeniseMitchelleLimos