This is not one of your normal reads. You know "The Oxygen Thief"? Well, this is just like that, I am literally writing a diary of my life and keeping myself and the characters anonymous. Sure, it doesn't help that my name is kinda on my user tag bu...
OMG!! so today I went on a wild roadtrip..... by myself! I feel proud to say the least.
Oops! This image does not follow our content guidelines. To continue publishing, please remove it or upload a different image.
So first I had to take my doggo to the vet which I did and it was really quick. Thing is that the vet was already 40 min away from home and more to where my friends live which is the West side of the island so they had a test and I went to see my family. I went to my cousin's house and saw my baby cousins and put my doggo on the leash outside so she could enjoy the day and such. It was fun actually so I enjoyed that.
About 3 hours-ish later I decided to meet up with my friends, I took pics and vids of the rosy sunset it was soo beautiful (don't use ur phone while driving please)....this meant meeting.....how do I call him??? Doctor, cause he loves Doctor Who. And I have only met him on the computer given that my ROTC (Air Force obviously) program is online. Anyways, we met up in an açaí place with Billie and the guy she's talking to, Mandy. Jiji get it now?
When we got there, it was already late so we bought something really fast, nonetheless, they finally met my doggo and my doggo was so shy and trembling cause she NEVER goes out, and much less meet more than 2 humans per day AND travel halfway the island to meet my friends. So it was fun to see her be so calm around then and my friends being super cute with her. She really likes the Doctor. I also wanted to meet him in person to see if it was only a "friend spark" or something else.... its a friend for sure. Don't you get those moments with a person where you see the potential but don't know what it is? It happens to me all the timepiece.
After getting the food, I bought a smoothie and it was SOOOO GOOOOOD. I asked at least Billy and Mandy to go accompany me to the gas station and I did my shit and when I went back he started driving away cause he was in a hurry and I frickin stopped and grabbed Billie's door just so I could hug her goodbye cause Dayum boi chill. I got so mad.
As I started driving home, doggo fell asleep and I called my BFF/sister......lets call her Luna, and we talked all the way through and I noticed I was very conflicted about this old friend of mine that we're going out on Friday soooo......
*Storytime!*
So in 2015, I met this guy at a camp who automatically liked me, but me being the 15 y/o dweeb that I was, I wasn't paying attention to anything. So I didn't even get the signs. I was at the lunch line and I was talking to this girl and he went to her and talked to her and then he went to me and the first thing he said was:
"You look like the kind of girl that likes to read books"
Oops! This image does not follow our content guidelines. To continue publishing, please remove it or upload a different image.
Keep in mind, guys had never talked to me about that, they were all stupid and only focused on the physical. So I was like:
*blushes* "haha umm yeah, I guess"
And he just starts to talk to me until I end up giving him my number. Fast forward, that night he actually called me and I was scared shitless okay?! But I still answered and we talked for like 3 hours. We talked so much I was walking on the bathtub railing! LOL. And that night we agreed to exchange our favorite book and give it back after reading it.
The next day, I gave him Looking for Alaska by John Green, which is my first YA favorite book, and he gave me El Zahír by Paulo Coehlo which..... it's not bad but I don't like to read in my native language (Spanish) unless it's obligatory. So fast forward to a week later and he gets kicked out of the program because he "supposedly" punched a little kid and I....lost my favorite book.
Worst of all, I lost my book, and that same August I was going to a boarding school (it was amazing...more on that later) and it was across the island so it was going to be twice as hard AND I was still so shy that I never spoke up for myself so I never got my book back.
anddddd later on we kept talking and he then told me that he lost the book and I was like "meh" it was expected tbh. He said he would buy it for me but that would mean meeting up with him and no.... nope I was still very awkward and weird and nope..... so I bought the book AGAIN
Years go by and he stopped asking me out and stuff cause I was a really hard catch and we just became friends, and one day he tells me "you never finished my book did you?" and I was like "no, why?" he then proceeded to tell me that I should just skip to the last page..... keep in mind that Im on a call with him okay?! And I just start reading it..... he left me a note.
It said...
"The freckles on your face drive me crazy" WHAT KIND OF CHEESY IS THIS?!!
I was just silent for like 30 seconds until he breaks the silence and just changes the topic. I was still bad at accepting compliments so I was like "Thanks?" omg, I wish I could bitch slap myself so hard.
Throughout the years, we've always kept some sort of contact. Like we are the kind of friends that talk every 5 to 6 months and it's like we've never stopped talking.
*End of Storytime*
So now that you've got some background info on...... Atom idk, he actually confessed to me that he had a crush on me but I knew that already and I continued to tell him that I too had a crush on him. But he said it like it was something old and stuff. so yeah...
With that said, now we go out sometimes and on Friday we planned to go eat at Bahama Bucks so Idk cause he plans to stuff and there was a time he was very flakey but now IDK. And last time we went out, he was very touchy-feely but in a respectful way and it was cute but Idk if I see him that way, and I told Luna it was more because he doesn't seem to know where he wants to go in his life and that stresses me because I know what I want to be and it's not like I have it all planned out but at least I'm going down a route so it counts for something. And that's lit one of the little things that get to me because I don't want to pout my heart and soul onto someone when I'm just going to leave in like 2 years and maybe by then he still doesn't know what he wants. Maybe it's cause he respects me so much and I like my men to be more on the flirty side and stuff but we are such good friends that it's hard doing that.
