Fallen

Chapter Twelve

Author's Note: I'm sorry I've been so terrible with updating, it's like my life just got busy out of nowhere >.< but I hope you enjoy this chapter!

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Dean decides that touching Cas is probably his favourite thing in the world. His love for hearing Cas moan Dean's own name is equal to his love for pie, maybe even more. But if there is anything better than touching Cas, it is Cas touching him. That angel mouth sure could do wonders, and just the thought of it makes him crave more. Dean wants so much more. Part of it terrifies him. He knows about how two boys have sex. He knows how frowned upon it is. But none of it seems to matter, because this is Cas. And whether Cas is a boy, girl or a fucking penguin, he will still want him. Dean wants him more than anything.

They never talk about it, though. They go as far as touching and blow jobs but none of them dare to bring up going further. Dean wonders if Cas even knows how  to go further. Should Dean make the first move? The question ponders endlessly in his thoughts, but he doesn't want to offend the angel. It is already bad enough what they are doing. Dean knows that homosexuality is a 'sin' and the fact that Cas is an angel of God makes it all seem so much worse. He is scared that others angels will find out. That Cas will get sent to hell for doing such a thing. He is so, so scared.

When Dean brings the subject of matter up, Cas stares at him, his eyes soft, slightly confused and his head cocked to the right. 

"Please do not worry about me, Dean. That is the last thing I want you to do." Cas speaks, his voice almost a whisper. "Don't be scared. If you have faith, then you shouldn't be scared of anything." 

Dean drowns in the eyes that are locked on his. "I just...don't want to lose you." His eyes well up with tears and he huffs out a small laugh, wiping them and sniffing his nose. "This is turning into way too much of a chick flick moment."

Cas places a hand softly on Dean's cheek and smiles as Dean leans into the touch. 

"And what's so bad about that? Love is a beautiful thing, Dean."

Dean swallows hard, his breath caught in his throat. "Cas...I-"

"Shhhhh," Cas wipes away the tears that have fallen down Dean's face and he leans in slowly, stopping just as their lips brush against each other. "I know, baby...I know..."

"I just...So much...You're everything..." Dean baffles, his words tangling in a knot, but still, Cas seems to make sense of them, like he is reading Dean's thoughts.

"Shhhh," Cas repeats, the vibration of his lips against Dean's making Dean shiver. "I want to try something."

And if Dean thinks his heart couldn't thud any louder, he is mistaken. 

"...W-What?" Dean stutters, running his tongue over his lips, anticipation sparking through his blood.

Cas unbuttons the shirt he is wearing and pulls it off, leaving his top half bare-skinned. Dean observes in silence, his eyes slit in a gaze.

 "Close your eyes." Cas speaks, his voice calm, but slightly firm. "Trust me."

Dean's eyes widen but he nods quickly after and his eyes flutter closed.

"Have faith, Dean. Don't be scared." Cas' breath tickles his skin. "Now open them."

Dean flicks his right eye open slowly, and then soon his left. And when he looks at Cas, he almost forgets how to get oxygen to his lungs.

A pair of enormous, creamy coloured and fluffed up wings are hanging from Cas' back. Cas' eyes are wide now, staring back at Dean, taking in his reaction. Dean can tell that Cas is nervous. He can tell by his flushed cheeks and his lips that are pursed together and his wings. Oh, god, his wings. It is almost like they leaked emotion. Dean knows that Cas can read his mind, but often chooses not to because he is respectful of privacy, but for once, Dean feels like he can read Cas. The way the wings are hanging so elegantly, moving so softly, but tightening themselves behind Cas' back. There is no way to describe the true beauty of them. Dean tries, in his mind, and his thoughts cross to a lazy sunset on a grainy beach, the breeze leaving goosebumps on his skin, but even that thought is nowhere near how beautiful Cas' wings are.

"I am so, so in love with you." Dean breathes out the words like it is the most simple thing he ever could have said. He doesn't even have time to redden from realisation of what he just admitted because Cas' lips are suddenly smushed against his and he is straddling Dean, grinding his hips down against him.

Dean kisses back with every fiber of his being. He feels his bones ignite at Cas' touch, his veins turning to fire. Dean breaks away for a moment to pull off his shirt before pulling Cas back in, grinning at the skin-on-skin contact. Cas pushes Dean back down onto the mattress and rolls them both over before pushing himself back up so Dean is wrapped around Cas instead. Dean's jaw drops when Cas' wings envelope themselves around the both of them, like they are a secret hidden away from everything and everyone. 

"Do you want to touch them?" Cas whispers, his voice rough and even lower than usual.

Dean stares at Cas and licks his lips, nodding in agreement, before his hand digs itself into Cas' left wing, grabbing a handful of feathers and pulling on them gently. Cas leans his head against Dean's shoulder, a very inhuman noise leaving his lips, causing Dean to pull his hand back.

"Cas? Did I hurt you?!" Dean lets out, fear suddenly rushing through his veins.

Cas turns his head to look up at Dean, his pupils are incredibly dilated, cheeks flushed and his mouth is parted slightly. It doesn't take long for Dean to catch on to what is happening.

Cas has told Dean once that his wings are private, but Dean wasn't sure exactly what he meant by that. It all makes sense to him now. Having Cas like this; so vulnerable, those lustful eyes locked directly on him. It sure is something. He feels himself so hard in his pants that it is starting to get painful and he aches to be touched, but this isn't about him. This is about Cas. This is about making Cas feel as heavenly as an angel could.

Dean brings his hand back up to Cas' wing and strokes it, more gently this time. Cas closes his eyes and tilts his head to the side as Dean starts nibbling his neck. 

"D-Dean..." Cas' manages to hitch out in between many shortened breaths.

"It's okay baby, I've got you...I've got you." Dean leans up to kiss Cas' wings, not being able to keep the grin off his face.

The world blurs out, and Cas feels like he had taken ecstasy. Dean continues to run his fingers through Cas' feathers, occasionally pinching a few, and Cas making wonderful noises in return. As Cas' moaning gets louder, his grip on Dean gets tighter, and Dean notices that his feathers are starting to become soaked in something that quite resembles the texture of...oil?

Cas is covered in it. His wings just keep producing more and more until Cas suddenly cries out, leaning his head against Dean's shoulder for support and holding onto him so tightly that bruises started to show. Cas limps in Dean's arms and they stay like this for a while. Dean with his arms wrapped around Cas, and Cas with his wings wrapped around Dean.

"Dean?" Cas whispers, after a few minutes of silence.

"Yeah, Cas?"

"I am very, very much in love with you also."