Always and Forever

Chapter 60: Night and Day

CLARKE POV
I was on my way out of Lexa's room when she called for me.

Lexa: Clarke?

Me: Yes?

Lexa: Stay with me?

I pause for a second and smile. It's awkward but she's vulnerable right now. I nod and made my way to her beside the bed. I pull up a chair and sit. She just stares at me.

Me: What?

She shooks her head and scoots to the side to make a space for me on the bed. She pats the space beside her for me to lay down to. I froze for a second but nod.

Lexa and I were laying down a bit awkward until she broke the silence.

Lexa: Were you happy?

Me: In France?

She nods then turns to look at me. I turn and we were both face to face. I look at those forest green eyes again and I can't seem to stop staring at them.

Lexa: Were you?

Me: I.. i-uh. Yes I was happy there. I had people.

Lexa: Oh. People. You mean the girl and your kid?

Me: Yea. Them. They were the 1st people I open up to. They stayed even after all my mental breakdown.

Lexa: You had breakdowns?

I nod and gave her a sad smile.

Lexa: Do you still have them?

Me: No. It stopped after a year and a half after the accident. But I still have horrible headaches til now. Doctors say i should stay away from too much stress. My brain apparently hasn't moved on from the trauma so it's not good for it to be triggered by stress or anything.

Lexa: I'm sorry you had to go through all of that alone

Me: I know. I wasn't alone but yes, it was hard. Especially the 1st year. I mean, i had dad but he was always busy.

Lexa just nods at me.

Me: How about you? How are you?

Lexa: I'm okay. I think.

Me: You can tell me anything right?

Lexa: i know. What do you want to know?

I turn around to get the bottle of her pills and I show it to her.

Lexa: Oh. That. Well, when you disappeared, i fell down the rabbit hole. It was hard to get back up. Raven and Octavia were hiding me from Abby and Marcus. And they were actually the ones going to school for me. They literally did all the work during the 2nd term of freshman year.

Me: Oh i'm sorry. I didn't know.

Lexa: Don't worry. You really didn't know. When Abby and Marcus found out, they helped me. I didn't go to rehab but I stayed at Abby's and became better then. It felt like home. Those pills were prescribed to me. I still take them because I still worry where you are and what's happening to you.

Me: I'm here now.