Still Here

friday night sleepover.

"Derek put me down, right now!!" I shout ,kicking and wiggling.

He laughs and slides me down and places me on my feet.

I huff in frustration and stomp on his foot. He doesn't even flinch  he just continues laughing.

I turn around and face Jason, he gaze on me sends a fire to my core.
I burry down my feelings, to the best I can.

"Were you enjoying the show?" I ask , placing my hand on my hip.

"Well , I was face to face with your wiggling ass, so im going to say yes.
But the psycho look ,you're giving me is telling me I should say no."  Derek says  trying to hold in his laugh.

He steps closer , I can feel the heat from his body  reaching for me.

He looks down and i can see hunger in his eyes.

"Did you get my note?" He whispers

My eyes open wide in shock,  the note in my locker thats now in my back pocket is from him? I guess I should have known, only Derek knew I changed lockers.

"Yes, but I haven't had a chance to read it yet." I explain.

He smiles and bends down to whisper in my ear. The warmth of his breath on my ear and neck makes goosebumps erupt all over.

"Let me know." 

I look up at him with confusion written all over my face.  He kisses my forehead  and turns and jogs off to his car.

I feel like my legs have turned into jelly.
I stare off ,watching him reach his car and take off.

I hear Derek singing , "Jason and Neenee sitting in a tree k.i.s.s.i.n.g.

I spin around and stare daggers at Derek.

"Oh, shit!" He shouts and he takes off to his truck.

"I will get you Derek!!" I yell ,running after him.
He speeds off and rounds around his truck.

I take off one of my shoes and bend down just enough so he can't see me. I see he dart to the front of the truck, I quickly angle myself just right and toss it straight for him.

"Thanx dad" I say aloud. Memories of my dad teaching me to toss a football invade my mind.

"Owe, Ronnie that hurt!" He roars.

"Next time you will listen!" I snap

He walks around rubbing the side of his head that my shoe hit. He has my shoe in his hand and he tosses it over to me.
I caught it with one hand and shove my foot in.

"Hmm, I think someone is embarrassed about their kissy kissy  moment." He mocks as he hops in the drivers side.

I jump in and slam my door. "Aye aye, be careful! This is my baby!" Derek snaps ,patting his steering wheel like its a cute little puppy.

"Anyways, are you going to come straight over or do you need to wait for the twins to get home and all of you come over together?" I ask because i really don't want to be alone in the house right now.

"I can come right over, your dad is picking  them up with sebby. I just need to run in the house real fast , to grab our stuff." He explains

"Ok great!" I exclaim with genuine excitement.

Couple hours later, we were all in the living room. The twins and Sebastian were laying on the floor eating pop corn.Derek and I  were on the couch snuggled with a blanket still eating pizza we had ordered earlier.
Dad was in his recliner, half sleep.

We all decided to watch Hocus Pocus and then the conjuring.

The twins and seb took turns scaring each other, then they would sneak attack Derek.

After a while the kids fell asleep in a fort they made in sebs bedroom.
The sleep over was a major success. It warmed my heart to see my brother so happy.

He doesn't show it ,but I know he still worries about me.

I'm just glad he is finally able to be a kid.

Derek went to take a shower after me ,so I waited in my bedroom for him to be done.

It was the first time I was alone so i climbed into bed and pulled out the note Jason placed on my locker.

It felt like energy was bubbling in my belly. I dont know why id be nervous about reading a note. Its not like he was there watching me read it.
I let out a deep breath and opened it up.

I immediately smiled so hard I felt the burn in my cheeks.
He had illustrated a small doodle of a female version of hulk.

I began reading, " little she hulk,  I bet I made you smile with my amazing art skills , didn't i?
Anyways, Damien told me you are joining the group thats going on the haunted tour on Saturday. I wasn't going to go, but if it means I can see your beautiful smile , ill for sure be there.
Give me a txt , id rather hear from you than Damien.  He's not my type lol.
555-0591

Dont think about me too much.
Jason."

I folded up the note after putting his number in my contacts.

The teenage girl in my wanted to scream and dance around my room like they do in the movies.
That part of me died a long time ago. I haven't let myself feel anything like a normal teenage girl with a crush. Not since before my nightmares became real.

Maybe me feeling like this means I'm ready to let my past go.
I hear the shower turn off, so I decide to send Jason a quick text ..

Me- Hey , its me Ronnie. Sorry its late but I just read your note.
I'm assuming this means I'll be seeing you tomorrow.

Me- trust me I'm not thinking about you at all;-).

I put my phone back on my night stand and layed down. I felt the bed dip on my side, I look over and see Derek texting on his phone.

"Texting lover boy?" I ask in a lovey dovey tone.

"Duh, he texts more than any girl I've ever been with. I think his phone is glued to his hand." He explains as he places his phone on the night stand on his side.
He plops down and pulls his hair so its laying to the side of his pillow.

We sit in silence for a few seconds. I turn off the lamp beside me and let out a sigh of pure exhaustion.

"Hey  Neenee, where are you from?"his Curiosity shining through.

"We moved here from texas." I answer with a shrug.

He doesn't answer back, I figure he fell asleep , I close my eyes to follow his lead.

"No, I mean... where are you REALLY from?" He whispers

Sitting up with a jolt, I turn and look at him. I recognized the meaning behind the question.

I was lost for words , did I let something slip? Did my accent come out?

I knew in my heart I could trust him. We may not have known each other long but I feel his big heart and golden soul through every breath he takes.

Could I tell him about my past? Tell him about the man who scarred my face and robbed me of my innocence?

I grab his hand and squeeze, " Russia". I whispered so low as if I was scared someone was listening to us.

He sits up and looks at me. The only light in my room was the moon light coming from the cracks underneath the curtains.

I was about to explain a tiny bit further, but the door to my bedroom abruptly slammed shut. The force behind it was so rough, a picture frame on the wall crashed to the floor.

Dereks hand in mine gripped tightly.

"Wwhat was that?" He whispered in a low voice.