Off With His Head

35. It will be okay, Peyton

They took him.

He's gone. Gone. Gone.

You're a man of your word, Zacharias. So you better keep that promise.

If only to hear you call me Zacharias again.

Gone.

The words play on repeat in my mind, while I manage to help Caleb down to the medical ward and hand him to Angie. She immediately springs into action, cleaning the wounds on his face and arms while he groans in pain.

I need to know what happened on that mission. I need to find a way to get Zach back. But Angie gives Caleb a sedative and puts him to sleep, announcing that; "he's going to be just fine. He just needs some rest."

I leave her as she's stitching up a particularly nasty cut on his cheek and head off to Lideri's room, determination in my every step. The hallways feel like an endless concrete tunnel with walls that are quickly closing in on me. The pain in my stomach is forgotten, my entire body taken over with an entirely new crushing ache that seems to be stemming from my heart.

Caring about people only leads to pain. I know that first hand.

Zach was right. This hurts like hell. It stings and pulses with a life of its own, threatening to overwhelm me. I do my best not let to it, focusing on getting to those double doors made of silver and iron. When I'm finally in front of them, I enter without knocking, finding Lideri going over some paperwork at his table. He looks up at me with his one eye and stands, keeping one hand on his chair. It's as though he knows that the world beneath our feet has been shattered and he needs to hold on for balance.

"They took Zach," I burst out, finding myself dangerously close to tears. My words are a jumbled mess as I try to get my point across. "The vampires. He's gone. Caleb's in medical ward. Severely hurt."

Has it ever occurred to you, that maybe I just don't want you to get hurt?

Lideri looks at me for a long moment, his mahogany eye wide and cloaked in sadness. His silence is unnerving, stretching out for far too long. I can't help the impatience that washes over me as he just stands there, staring at me. Wasn't Zach supposed to be the next Lideri? Shouldn't the current one be more concerned for his well-being?

Or maybe I'm being unfair and he is just in shock. I know I am.

"If Zach was taken," Lideri finally speaks. "That means he is lost to us."

"What?" My voice raises in disbelief. I'm too stunned to apologise for my rudeness, sure I must have heard him incorrectly, because there is no way that Lideri just said what I think he did.

"Peyton, if they have taken him, it's for a reason. The chances of finding him are slim. The chances of us finding him alive or unturned, are almost zero." His voice cracks on the last word and a lone tear slides down his cheek. It's this more than anything that makes me realise how serious he is.

"So we just give up?" I ask incredulously, trying not to focus on the phrase 'almost zero'. If there's even a one percent chance that Zach's okay, then that's all that matters to me. I can't even think about the alternative. Zach can't be dead. He just can't.

If you do die, I would notice your absence.

"I'm sorry, Peyton," Lideri says, looking genuinely distraught. "But that's the way it is. Zach knew the risk he took when he left tonight."

"But we have to at least try!" I insist, seconds away from losing my shit altogether. "We can track him on the monitors. We found this vampire before, we can do it again. How can you be so callous about this?"