Things That Fade

Prologue

There are things that grow, there are things that shrink. There are things that live and there are things that die. There are things that are precious, and then again there are those that are worthless. Some things just appear to you out of the blue; it could be a sudden upsurge oflove that you have for someone that you sit in complete silence with every day, or even a glint of vulnerability in the eyes of a boy who seems nothing less than unbreakable. Of course, there are some things that abruptly disappear; too fast for you to even realize it. They vanish without a trace and they tend to leave you wanting, hoping, and missing; as if a part of you was torn out. But in my opinion, the most interesting things are those that fade; those that take their time. Those things that wait and, when the timing is appropriate, they withdraw from everything around them. They die away, in the most beautiful sense of the phrase. Those are the things worth looking for. Those are the things worth holding on to; that is, for as long as possible.

           

                 It was five in the morning on a rainy Monday. Had I not heard knocking on the door and a familiar voice yelling outside my house, I probably wouldn’t have gotten out of bed. As I walked lazily down the stairs, I could hear the knocking and the yelling getting louder and louder. In fear of losing my life earlier than I expected to, I rushed to the door and opened it only to find, much to my surprise, a calm dark haired girl standing on my front porch. Her hair was wet and disheveled. Her umbrella looked as if she had used it to beat a man to death, but the book in her hand was dry; no surprise, War and Peace, by Leo Tolstoy.

“Good morning, Hope.”

“Why weren’t you answering your phone? What’s all this about you taking a leave from school? That’s not something you can say nonchalantly, Catchy. What’s wrong?”

            She was trying her best to hide the panic in her tone, I could tell. She’d never admit it, but I know her like the back of my hand. For all the years that I’ve known Hope, not once have I ever needed her to explicitly tell me what’s on her mind or how she really feels. Hope is the world’s most complicated lock; and I was her master key.

“Relax, it’s nothing. I just felt like I needed to take a break, you know? Recharge the old batteries, I mean.”

“Are you kidding me? It’s our last year, and you still want to delay our graduation?”

“It’s just one year, Hope. Calm down.”

“You realize how much work we have to put off in that one year, right?”

“Wait, why do you keep saying we?”

“Well…”

“Hope… Spill. Now.”

            Her gaze went down to her shoes and she started fiddling with her skirt; a habit of hers whenever she was nervous. If I gave her the slightest chance, she would start stalling by bringing up an array of topics that have absolutely nothing to do with my question.

“Hope, don’t even try to change the topic. What did you mean when you said we…?”

“Don’t get mad… I kind of… asked for a leave too, right after I heard you requested for one…”

            She smiled hesitantly at me; it was the smile of a child who was caught with her hand in the cookie jar. She then walked up to me and started nudging me with her head.

“Catchy… this is a good thing. Think about it. We can go anywhere we want! We can do anything we want! We can say anything we want—“

“If you break into a musical number right now, I will seriously have to restrain you.”

            Her gaze slowly shifted to me, and she started batting her eyelashes flirtatiously. She slowly backed away from me, wearing a smile that could make the Devil jealous.

“Oh? Where and how?”

“On my bed, with my handkerchiefs; that is, unless you prefer rope.”

“Yeah, you wish you were that lucky.”

            In almost a second, her mischievous countenance disappeared and was replaced by that of playful triumph as she skipped into my house and up the stairs. I let out a sigh; I couldn’t believe that I was happy to drag Hope into this. I had thought that I could keep it from her for as long as possible, but I suppose not.

           

         I skipped up his stairs as gingerly as I could, in hopes; false and foolish hopes, that this act I was putting on would look believable in his eyes. When I reached his bedroom, I sat on the bed and waited for him to arrive; half-expecting him to bring food and drinks. He always does; I’ve never asked him to, but he would constantly get upset whenever I asked him to stop, so eventually I just learned to let him be. I looked out his window and gazed at the spectacular view; even though I’ve been here for almost six years now, everything about it still amazes me.

Lyon, France on a rainy Monday morning; there’s nothing in the world quite like it.

At that very moment, he appeared almost instantly behind me and embraced me. His arms wrapped around my body as if it were a blanket protecting me from the chill of the world. For some reason, he smelled faintly of vanilla. He planted a soft kiss on my cheeks and moved in to whisper.

“You know, Hope. I’m glad I came here, with you.”

            I turned to look him in the eye, only to be met by a soft kiss on my lips. I couldn’t help but smile; six years ago I could still probably hide how I smile every time he looks at me. Six years ago, I could still probably pretend like he wasn’t the highlight of my day. Six years ago I could still put up this act of nonchalance without breaking a sweat. And now, it takes every ounce of effort I can muster to not explode into frantic I love you’s and to restrain myself around him. Six years ago, Catchy created a crevice in the dam within my heart; now that dam’s about to collapse.

“I’m glad too. I still can’t believe you did, though.”

            He smiled at me; and just like that, MY heart wasn’t my own anymore, it hasn’t been ever since I met him, and every single day since then, he’s been constantly stealing it away from me.

“I thought I told you. I’d follow you to the ends of the Earth.”

            He laid me down on the bed, and with his right thumb stroking my cheeks, he planted a small kiss on my forehead. For what seemed like the longest time, we just stayed there, in each other’s arms, that is, until he decided to break our silence; the silence that seemed to linger between us when we both know that nothing needs to be said, with a simple question.

“…Hope…?”

            I stared into his eyes and, although it may just be my mind playing tricks on me, I saw my reflection start to quiver; his pools of brown were watering. He showed me his empty hand and, in the split-second that it took me to blink, he pulled out a ring from thin air. My hands were shaking, my breath was faltering, and my voice was cracking. My body had already begun betraying this little play I put on; the dam just gave way.

“… Stay?”

            It was stupid to even ask.