Dying In Disguise (DISCONTINUED)

Chapter 12

"Why don't you eat something are you feeling well?"

No

"Aren't you hungry, hon?"

No

"I remember how you always liked my blue-berry pancakes, I went on and made you a plate."

I glared at them, slathered in 800 calorie syrupy substance staring right back up at me adorned in a false facade of health with its scattered bits of berries. A glass of milk was then set before me, reflecting my heavily-bagged eyes.

I refused to look into the face of Zach's mother, who happily stood before me after preparing what had once been a favorite meal of mine.

"Are you sure you're alright? Zach told me about the incident last night. We didn't get in till eleven, I would have called your mother if I'd known."

"I'm sure, Mrs. Sandler. And don't worry about calling my mom, she knows I'm here and she's sending my things to school with Sheri."

She nodded as her fair brows knitted together.

I raised my fork and began to divide the pancakes evenly across my plate. Zach's footsteps pounded down the stairs before he entered the kitchen with his bag draped over his shoulder.

"Morning Mom. Hey Kels, you sleep okay last night?"

I nodded as I continued rearranged the items on my plate. Zach reached into the fridge and pulled out a can of red-bull. His mother protested shortly afterwards.

"Put that back, it's seven in the morning."

"Exactly. I need a boost."

As they continued their morning routine on the opposite side of the kitchen, I took the opportunity as it was presented.

My fingers all but skimmed the glass of milk sending it tilting onto the plate. There was a clatter of glass colliding as its contents seeped into the food. I yanked my hand away as the remains spilled off the counter and onto the tile.

"Oh shoot!!"

The sudden outburst caught their attention before Mrs. Sandler rushed over.

"Aww, what a shame," she sighed reaching for a cloth. "I'd make you another batch hon, but the bus should be pulling up in fifteen minutes."

"It's alright," I feigned disappointment the best I could, "I'll clean it up. It's my fault."

She waved me away.

"No, you go finish getting ready for school. I've got it."

My conscience bit at me as she hovered over my mess and began to wipe it up.

Better that than poisoning your body

On that note, I started for the door and unlatched the lock to step onto the porch. As I sat myself on the bench to wait for the bus, I temporarily entertained myself by watching Raleigh chase his tail around in circles. Only a moment later the door was pulled back open, revealing Zach. I made no eye contact as he took the seat beside me.

"So, what happened in there?"

His question caught me by surprise. I frowned.

"I accidentally spilled my milk. Had a usual clumsy Kelsi moment, didn't you see?"

"Oh yeah, I saw," he chuckled briefly, but in an instant his smile faded. "But it didn't look like an accident."

I tried not flinch at this sudden comment. As The confrontation played through my mind, I didn't have the time to formulate an immediate response.

"You're hiding something, I'm not dumb Kelsi."

I couldn't speak. His next question only escalated my anxiety.

"Is it true?"

"What are you even talking about?"

Zach turned away, then. I detected his muscles tensing up from beneath his tee, as he ran a hand through his hair.

"All of it. You know I don't listen to gossip or any of that shit, but..."

I dared him to say it. I wanted him to relay one single thing he'd heard about me from them. His mind must have caught up with his words as he stopped mid-sentence, a look of terror crossing his features.

"I'm sorry."

Fortunately, the bus rolled into view at this moment. I stood to my feet, rushing away from him as tears doubled my vision. A wave of desperation flooded over me, nearly sending me colliding into another student while I maneuvered towards the back. In an instant, Zach was right on my heels, placing himself into the seat beside me.

"Kelsi," he started, his voice laced with guilt. I turned to him then, my arms folded defensively across my chest. The fact that he knew me so well, surfaced as he immediately cut to the chase. "I was out of line, and I'm sorry. I truly mean it."

"Then tell me what they've been saying." I nodded at him. "Go on. I can take it."

There words were nothing compared to my own mind.

"I can't-," he started for a better word, "You're already in tears now. How about we just forget it."

"The only reason I'm crying, is because I'm frustrated damn it!" My anger was unleashed on him again. "Gosh, Zach , can't you see you're only making it worse? Please just tell me..."

He sighed and and averted his eyes from me.

"It's just..you've been.."

I raised an eyebrow.

"You've been acting really distant since Sherri and I started hanging out with other people. And I feel like you're almost afraid that we're replacing you or something, I don't know." He rambled off aimlessly, before resting his eyes on my face once more. "Of course we're not, even though it may look that way. And that thing at the house with the spilled milk, is it the attention that you want or...?"

I remained silent as my mind tried to assess everything he was telling me. It was almost like the sugar-coated version of the bs story Sher gave yesterday. He finally got the hint to stop talking, and we continued the rest of the ride in silence. But, I was fine with it. I enjoyed the peace of mind even if only for a little while that he had been hinting at an entirely different subject than what I had feared.

Our bus pulled to a halt as we entered the parking lot, but my anxieties were settled for today. It's funny how I hadn't seen it before, but what I should have realized is that this situation is more of a blessing than a curse. I watched Zach fumble with his phone out of the corner of my eye. He alternated, locking then unlocking his phone, awaiting notifications as I sat silently beside him. Oblivion.

The corners of my mouth raised as students began filing off the bus. No one noticed. No one cared. My secret was safe, and I could continue as I wished. Without anyone worrying about me, I could skip as many meals as I wanted. My schedule was open to exercise anytime. Losing the weight would be easy. I would finally be happy with myself, and no one would ever know the measures I took to achieve it.

We'll finally be beautiful

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A/N: Surprise update! I felt pretty bad about the length of the last chapter so I'm hoping this makes up for it, even though it isn't too much longer. Maybe I'll combine them later. Anyway, I was in a creative mood and I wrote this chappie pretty fast so if there are a lot of errors, that would explain why. As usual, all comments are very much appreciated so don't be a ghost reader :) thanks for the read, I'll try to update soon!