Gabriel: Prequel

twenty one

[ gabe's pov] 

Sitting outside, the warm flush of the breeze flutters over me as I close my eyes, letting the hot air fan me. Beside me, Harper scrunches her face in concentration as she leafs through a pregnancy book - a sight I never thought I would see, frankly.

"Isn't your house somewhere here?" She suddenly asks, peering out past the city. Technically, we have a day off from the gang and decided to sit in the middle of town like we used; in the past, we would have spoken about how much we didn't want kids, and now, fate has messed with us. 

I nod, pointing past the supermarket, blowing air from my mouth. "Yeah, but not my house anymore."

"Mhm, my bad."

We sit in silence for a while, switching from people watching to conversations ranging from my family to hers, and vice versa. It feels as though the baby, although unborn, threaded a new string between us, pushing us closer. A feeling I don't think I want to leave.

"I think names are important at this stage."

"Not yet," she shakes her head, "the book says making names this earlier could lead to arguments in case we don't like it. Who am I to refuse this book?"

"My girlfriend?"

Harper rolls her eyes dismissively, but still pats my thigh as she continues reading. "Sure, sure, although, we've never had this conversation."

"I thought my feelings were clear."

"What feelings?" Her eyes spark with curiosity as she slyly smiles, probably very sure of them.

"Well,-" I begin and never finish as my eyes zone in on a familiar man as he walks side by side with a younger woman, their hands intertwined as he leans down to kiss her deeply. The unmistakable fierceness of the blue in his eyes and the bronze tan coloured on his skin halts me from finishing. I'm sure I see my dad in front of me, but with another woman. My heart doesn't pound in surprise, as, subconsciously, I think nothing that he could do would surprise me. 

Harper follows my gaze, silently leaning back in her seat. "It's not your place to do anything."

"Huh?"

"I know you: you want to tell your mom, but playing hero won't change anything. Don't be stupid," she murmurs, resuming her book.

"I'd want to know if you cheated on me, though. And, they're married! Even if he is a bastard, my mom deserves better," I retort, leaning forward in thought. Truth hides behind what she's saying, but I would want to tell her. She deserves this at the very least. I get up instantly, leaning down to place a feather light kiss on Harper's temple; "I'll be back quick, don't worry."

Without waiting to listen to her complaints, I hop over the bench, the idea of him coming home before me pushing me faster to reach there. The world blurs past me as colours of blue and black run in my eyes, and the ache in my legs starts to throb until I'm jumping fences to my backyard. I run in without taking a breath, calling for her. She stands in the kitchen, unimpressed. "Gabriel?"

"I need to talk to you," I pant, resting my hands on my knees and bending over to catch my breath. 

"It's been months. Talk."

"Not about me, mom. I saw dad with another woman. There's no point beating around the bush and I saw it just now."

Her face is smooth and passive, no trace of anger or sadness spotted. She, instead, calmly continues to speak, "Telling lies won't make me forget how you abandoned us."

I stare at her incredulously, the words starting to evaporate. "Mom, no. Why would I lie? I came over straight away. If I haven't been here in months, then why would I come now with a stupid lie? I'm trying to protect you, please," I step closer to her but she retreats, turning around, revealing my dad standing in the doorway. 

"Honey, I told you he'd be no good. Jumping towns like that would do this," he coaxes her, his voice slick as she is beckoned to his side, both of them staring in disgust at me. 

I quickly realise it's a losing battle and turn out the door, stopping when he follows after me in the garden, sneering. "You and your little whore, Gabriel, should stop coming here."

My body freezes, the familiar, unwelcome kick of anxiety dredging in me. I know what will happen, and it's in my best interests to not react.

"Not talking, huh? Should I make you talk?" Again, I will my body into stillness, staring past him at my mother, who stays with her back turned. 

"What if I get the whore-" He doesn't manage to finish his sentence as I menacingly step closer, staring down at him; being an impressive height of six foot two allows me to intimidate him.

"I don't care what you say about me. Taunt me. Threaten me. Hit me. Don't talk about her, though," I attempt to say coolly, but become aware of the tremor in my voice.

He laughs smugly at finding his son's weakness, before his smile fades. My cheek stings as he delivers the first punch, his eyes darkening as he aims for my nose and my cheek again. Blackness threatens to overwhelm me as my vision darkens. I feel wetness from my face, and briefly consider fighting back, but I don't want to be as bad as him. My legs weakly guide me out into the open street where my vision fails me and I slump onto the streets, letting the darkness guide me. 

________________________________

"He's awake, you can leave now."

Opening my eyes, everything is blurry as I try to readjust my vision, blinking to make sense of everything. Harper looks over me in concern as I realise I'm leaning below her against a bed. I scan the room, understanding that it's A&E. 

"You are so fucking stupid, Gabe," she mutters, shaking her head.

"I'm confused."

"Yeah, me too. I went looking for you to see you bloody and passed out on the streets. Took me a while to realise it wasn't Axel. I fucking told you not to speak to your shitty parents. What did he say?"

As I take in her sight - her vicious, beautiful sight, I lean my head against the pillow, smiling faintly. Curses and profanities lace her every word, but care and worry are shielded behind them. How very beautiful.

"I don't remember," I lie, blinking frequently to put her off. I don't think she believes me as she frowns.

"The life you have is so shitty," she curses again, huffing.

"I don't like this life, either. I regret accepting your offer of the North, Harp. Our kid is gonna be entered in this life as soon as it's born. I don't want that," I admit, glancing at her stomach. She follows my gaze and nods.

"Me neither," she agrees quietly.

"There's no way out of this for them."

"No way out," she repeats. We look at each other, our eyes mirroring the same regret and fear for the future. We're in the same boat of uncertainty, making it less scary.

"If they weren't here, I'd probably kill myself. Angel, huh. We can give it the best life," she speaks up, a ghost smile on her lips.

"Angel?"

She shrugs, "Your name is Gabriel, and so if it was a girl, maybe something like that."

"Celeste?" I offer, and her eyes lighten as she nods.

"Celeste. I like it."

"And, I like you."

"Ditto."

"No, Harper," I stop her, taking her hand, "want to know my feelings? I think I love you. I think I was always taken aback by this crazy, angry woman. She's independent and vulnerable and I love her. Harp, I love you."

I expect her to mock me, but she takes me by surprise as she pushes me onto the bed, deeply kissing me and closing the curtain around us; bliss.