Unconfessed Sins

Chapter 5

Unconfessed Sins

Chapter Five

It was the end of a long day and Father Liam felt as if his insides had been pulled out through his ears! His stomach was churning and he had the most fearful headache. Early morning, he had called upon Mother Superior who had grown weaker during the night and could barely speak. He had given her the last rites, which had given her great peace and comfort, but had left him feeling hollow and empty.

That morning was confession for his parishioners and it had been such a dreary affair. Everyone had been coughing and spluttering as there was a cold bug going around and he had felt relieved to go home to his lunch! He hoped he didn't come down with the dreaded lurgy.

He had motored to Clevedon in the early afternoon for a meeting and then later in the afternoon, motored back to Bristol to meet the Archdeacon for yet another.

He had then confessed his 'unconfessed sin' to the Archdeacon who had absolved him. He remembered to tell the Archdeacon that he had also added £25 of his own personal money to the money paid out by the Insurance for the church fire. The Archdeacon had been pleased about that, if not a little disappointed in his bad behaviour, but as he said "It was a long time ago, Liam." But sin was sin, wasn't it? Never mind when it had been perpetrated! Perhaps now he could feel some peace, having shared his sin with another human being. He was also feeling confused because of the way he had touched Mother Superior's face, surely it had been inappropriate for a Priest? Although, truth to tell, he did not regret it one bit.

It was now 8.30 pm and he was still in the church sitting in the vestry, preparing the paperwork for a young catholic couple, members of the church, who were getting married on Saturday. It would be a most happy occasion for the whole church, but try as he might he was not looking forward to it. How could he bring himself to feel happy about anything, under these circumstances?

Suddenly he heard feet pounding down the aisle of the church and a loud voice calling 'Father Liam, are you there?' It sounded like one of the nuns and he wondered what the matter was, when a feeling like a hand squeezing his heart took him by surprise. Surely, Mother Superior was nearing her death and he was needed!

The youngest nun, Sister Mary, had cycled two miles in the pouring rain, so Father Liam made her leave her bicycle behind and he took her in his car back to the convent. They hurried through the cloisters into the convent and into the cell of Mother Superior. Sister Augusta and Sister Bernadette were kneeling by her bedside praying. He and Sister Mary stood quietly by while the sisters finished their prayer then Sister Bernadette stood up, her eyes wet with tears. "She has passed, Father. She died peacefully and in no pain just five minutes ago. It is a truly sad day for us all." He felt numb and in immense pain all at once, but went through a set of prayers like an automaton.

He looked at Mother Superior's pale face, still lovely in death and he placed her arms across her body, in the shape of the cross. How he would miss this kind, gentle woman who was so loved within the community. How would they manage to face another day without her?

The nuns made a fuss of him and led him to the kitchen for tea and cake. He sat at the table sipping his tea. "You will miss her friendship, won't you Father?" said Sister Augusta, "I know you were fond of each other." The tears Liam had left unshed were then released and he sobbed onto his arm on the table.

Father Liam was standing near the doorway, putting his hat and coat on to leave, when the elderly nun Sister Angelina came hobbling, slowly up to him. She had very painful knees and could no longer kneel to pray and was forced to use a walking stick. She was the most empathetic of the nuns in a way. She could always find the right word for any person in any situation and it always hit the heart of those listening.