Mandos

Chapter II

"Nelyo? Nelyo, wake up Come up", a known vocie says to me, which I can't tell to whom it belongs.

I open my eyes slowly. At first everything is unclear. I see dark wands around me and a cold flour beneath me.

Meanwhile my eyes focus on the eldar in front of me. I can see dark hair, silver eyes and a face far to much serious if you know that we both are dead.

"Atar", I sob and lay my large armes around his shoulders.

Feanor replies:"Yes, my beloved son, it's me. I'm so sorry, Nelyo!"
I smirk lightly and take my armes from his shoulders to look him in the eyes.

"Don't say sorry by me, father. I and my brothers followed you freely" I mean.
He says:"No father, uncle or brother should lead his beloved ones into death and suffering. I love you so much, Nelyo. You had to suffer the most."

I smile and replie:" It's ok. I forgive you and you have, like always my support besides you want to kill again."

"When did you grow up so fast?" he wonders. I laugh.

"Curufinwë, your time is up", the vocie comes from the back. The shoulders from my father started to sink and I see one of Námos Maiars¹, who takes my father from my side.

"Atar?", I ask not so calm anymore. I don't want to lose him again.

"Everthing is fine, my son. I will come back", my father replies.

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When I see my brothers, I crie and laugh both at the same time.
I hug them all one by one and all together. We all murn and think about Maglor, since it will take a long time til we meet him again.

I talk to Fingolfin and apologize again for the things me and my brothers did to him and his childrin. I speak to my whole family to Finrod and Orodeth, Angrod and Aegnor and to Turgon and Aredhel. I speak to other noldor too but most of them doesn't want to listen.
I don't accuse them for anything. I think I wouldn't listen to me either.

Besides all of the souls, I have met, with whom I laughed, cried and rememberd old days, my soul needs the rest from it so that I can even start to heal.

My light is missing.

After the adrenaline from the meeting is gone, my fea turns darker and darker and those around me start to think that I will turn mad like my father.

They aren't wrong.

My grandfather Finwë comes and stays beside me. I don't look at him. The black flour beneath my feet is the most interesting thing, that I could find.

Finwë looks at me and whispers compassionately:"Ask the lord of these halls, Nelyo. He is gone, you know this.
Námo had a tadk for his father but Nolofinwe wanted to tolerate with his brother again and forced him to go.
Sad me. I didin't talk to him much. 
Nolofinwe just speaks well about him. Could you tell me his story?
Could you tell me your story together?"

I smiled and startet to tell him my favourite story: The story of Fingon >Findekáno< the bravest hero from Beleriand.²

I can't stop to rave in front of our grandfather about Fingon, til I relized that my friend, cousin, beloved, husband, king has to hate me. I led him and his armees into death, just because of this damned Oath!

I start to crie.

He can't hate me. Eru, please not! I lived a houndred years without him. I cannot live without him anymore.

I wince when Finwë says my name concernedly.
"I..... I'm fine..... I.... I will go to Námo" I stutter and go away from him. I feel how he looks after me woried and confusedly but I have a lot of time in those halls to speak with him for another story of Fingon or not.  I smile sadly a little bit because of this thought that I will be here until the end of time.

A gust of wind blows into my face. Something manifested in front of me. It feels old and wise.

Námo.

"Nelyafinwë, son of Curufinwë. What is it?", he asks. I lift my head to meet his eyes and say:"My lord, I am longing for the other part of my soul but I can't find him here. Please, you have to help me!"
Námo smirks knowing and replies:"Findekáno is not in these halls.", my determinded look starts to sink, "but You've already knew this probably. He made some good things in his early life and I had a task for him to do."

The Valar of death looks very strictly at me when he speaks the last sentences.

"Is.... Is there any chance for me to see him? To talk to him?", I ask. Námo smirks again and answers:" He is the high king of the noldor now and he might have a desk full of work but I think that he would visit an old friend. And Estë dies, like we all know, at last.³

Never had anyone who lives entert my house but I think I've had made an exeption with Tinuvil.... and just like with her; I like him."

"I thank you so much, my lord!", I say quickly and I don't even try to hide my joy! Why should I?

The Valar disappeares again maybe to speak to one of his Maiars.

I'm so excited and worried to meet Fingon >Findekáno< again.

For the mess which are my thoughts, I have no time now because my youngest brothers come to me and they are speaking do fast that I can't understand what they are speaking about. I smile and follow them.

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¹ it's "Maiar" (and "Valar") in german but I don't know what is it in english
(Maiar: Eonwë, Melain, Gandalf....)

² I'm always making my favourite characters better than the others üand Fingon is my favourite character of all

³ this is just like the qoute "The hope dies at last." Aand because Estë is the valier of hope.....

Yes this was my next chapter!🥳
I hope you liked it!

~HighQueen01 ❤