Clueless | Detective a6d AU

18 - Grief

cw: religion, negative thoughts

Skeppy POV

~

"...What?" I say in shock.

The doctor explains, "Detective a6d experienced major head trauma and injuries, and so he ended up in a coma. Don't worry, he has no internal damages in the skull or brain. We expect that he'll wake up in a few days. Dream is doing okay, just needs some rest."

"R-right. T-thank you. Am I able to visit a6d?"

"Yes, you can come any day."

"Thank you, doctor. Goodbye."

I hang up the phone and cover my head in my hands. Tears form in my eyes. It's my fault. It's all my damn fault a6d and Dream ended up like this. I clench my fists and walk out to my car. I start it up and quickly drive to the hospital. 14 minutes later I arrive. I walk to the front desk and get registered. I walk around the halls until I see a room with a label that reads room 189. I open the door and see a6d laying in the hospital bed. I walk in slowly and sadness fills me. I sit next to him on a chair.

"Hey, a6d," I say, "I'm sorry. I'm sorry for everything. I know you can't hear me, but it would be a miracle if you did. You better wake up soon. You b-better. I c-could never forgive myself if you got worse. Please... Get better soon."

I squeeze a6d's hand as tears fall down my face. I look at his face, covered in red marks and scratches, and his headband is gone. An eyepatch is covering his eye. Maybe I could buy him a new one. 

"a6d, I'll be right back. I'm going to bring you something," I whisper.

I get up and leave his room slowly. I just feel depressed that a6d is like this. I go out and walk to the corner store and buy the same headband for him. I rush back to the hospital and into his room. I put the headband over the eyepatch and tighten it. I smile sadly, but it fades, I hear no reaction from him. I sit back in the chair in thought. I want... need him to get better. 

"Please. I need you here more than anything."

As I drift in thought, all the happy memories of us come through. Us streaming together, meeting for the first time, a6d moving here, the Trio all being together. And now it's all gone. Because of me. It's all my fault Bad was killed. It's all my fault Dream and a6d got hurt. Everything that caused this is my fault. Negative thoughts fill my mind quickly, blocking out anything happy.

You're not good enough.

You betrayed him.

You lied to everyone.

He trusted you.

You broke his promise.

You asshole.

It's your fault. 

You should have never come on that day.

You should have gotten killed.

It's my fault. It's all my fucking fault. I take a deep breath and sit up from my slouched position. 

"a6d, I'll come back tomorrow. I'm gonna go now."

I silently walk away from him. He lays on the bed, still unresponsive. I sigh sadly and walk out of his room. For some reason, I don't remember driving home, or anything after exiting his room. I'm suddenly at his house, sitting on the couch, with Ian next to me. It's like my mind is blank. Numb. Just nothing. I sit on the couch and stare in space. I don't know what is happening to me.