A friend of mine recently told me he'd had anal sex with his wife and how good it felt.
And since then, it's kept bugging me. I don't understand why someone would have anal sex with a woman. I mean, a guy actually has a prostate, he can feel shit down there. But a woman? A woman doesn't have anything in there. She's not going to be in pleasure. Nah it's just pain. Unless she's into that.
I'm which case stop fucking her and call a mental hospital or something. That bitch is mad. Stop being fucking Christian Grays who think hurting is sexy. Alpha male my arse.
But to be fair, the only times anal sex with a woman is justified is when you're in the middle of a gangbang or something, multiple holes have already been taken, and you're too impatient to wait your turn. Or when she's on her period and you're too horny to wait.
Oh wait. Why didn't I think of this before. I should talk about this with my girlfriend.
What's that?
Do I have a girlfriend?
Yes.
Is she real?
No(sad face)
Does my imaginary girlfriend in my imagination have imaginary periods?
Yes.
Why?
Because I have very realistic expectations for women.
Nah I'm just kidding she's a perfect 10 with massive tits.
