Deep in the thoughts

Rain

What do you think of when you hear rain? Something romantic? Something scary? Something annoying?

For me rain is like my depression. I can never say that I am in depression when I laugh my heart out. People can assume I am just trying to gain sympathy. Maybe if you have met me and I have talked about my feelings with you then you thought so too. Even I would say that it's bullshit if you laugh when you are sinking into depression.

Rain feels so good when the rain drop splatters on your face. You can enjoy the rain with your eyes closed looking high above the sky as if you are pleased with the rain. Maybe you feel like you are taking a shower in public with clothes on? But what about the after effect?

When you enjoy rain without an umbrella, you will feel that the gravity is stronger. You feel uncomfortable walking around with those wet clothes. But if you strip naked, then everyone will question you. You will be marked as a psycho. If you manage to walk in those clothes then what about the cold you will feel? You will be struck with the arrow in your head. You want to lay down but you can't. You want to sit but you will ruin the sofa. You urge to stay still, you will feel worst.

Depression is same as rain for me. It comes and goes just like how you ghost some people from your life everyday. The depression is heavy to hold. You wanna lie down but you don't think you are worth it. You wanna share your emotions but people are out there who will think you are emotionally stripped out and you are shameless.

Depression pulls you to underworld where devil whispers that you are no good. It will be your choice to let it go and hug the warm sun but the rain is ought to happen again. The depression has yet to show up again. Until then live your life to fullest, and enjoy and compliment everyone. You may not know the day you will be giving in to the depression.

Clutch your hand and resist the urge to rest. You yet have to see the sun again after all.