Separated ('Dread' Series Book 1)

YuYeon Drama

(Yuqi's POV)

"Soyeon unnie, can you stop working for a bit? I want to spend time with you!" I said with aegyo as I used my puppy eyes to try to persuade Soyeon. Soyeon shook her head and continued brainstorming lyrics for their new comeback. I was sick of this happening over and over; the continuous disregard and neglect made me angry.  "I know you're working, but you should at least leave some time for me!" At this point, my voice had risen. Soyeon gave me a glare, showing something like, "Are you kidding me?" I was now furious. I spilled out all my thoughts. All of those shouldn't-be-said thoughts came out.

"It's like you care about work more than me! I thought it wasn't possible but I don't even know at this point. If you really cared about my feelings, you would have spent more time with me! You know what? It's fine. I don't need your time anyway. You never even loved me in the first place!" My voice was higher a whole octave, and the whole building could probably hear me yelling. Without realizing it, my tears leaked out. I ran into my room and slammed the door shut. Soyeon on the other hand was attacked by my words.

"How could she think I didn't love her?" Soyeon thought. She held back her tears and pain. She had to act like she didn't care. Otherwise, Soyeon would have shown her weak side. That was her worst fear. 

Crying in bed, I wanted to punch myself. Already, I felt bad and regretted saying all those terrible things to Soyeon. Feeling lonely, I needed someone. I needed Minnie. I knew it was okay to talk to her about anything. She was perpetually there for me. I didn't even need to find her. She was already by my side, hugging me like I was a stuffed animal. Minnie was my roommate, so we're really close. It's true, I secretly have a crush on Soyeon, but I'm also really grateful for Minnie. 

"Unnie, can I talk with you for a little bit?" I asked. 

"Of course." She sat down next to me on my bed and waiting patiently for me to start. But nothing came out from my mouth. All I wanted to do was cry. So I did. I cried my heart out because of the unsolved problem with Soyeon. Minnie comforted me even without knowing the situation. 

"Whatever's going on, it's okay.  We all love you, and we'll always be here for you." She said softly.

"Well, probably not Soyeon."  I thought to myself silently. Nevertheless, I nodded and acted as if I understood. But I couldn't pretend I was fine. I wasn't. I was finally ready to share my thoughts. "I know, it's just...I feel like Soyeon isn't spending enough time with us. I know she's busy and stuff, but it makes me feel distant from her." Minnie expressed that she did not have empathy for me and that she did not feel the same. It really seems like it's just me who thinks so. Is it because...I have a soft spot for Soyeon? Or am I just overthinking this?

I really cherish the time filming variety shows together with the other members. It was the only time we were all together at the same time and not talking about work. We would be playing fun games and laughing with each other. Sadly, this didn't have that often. And even if it did, it was only for a few hours. Still, it was nice to think about those happy times. When are we going to film another variety show? My thoughts were cut off by a boisterous, bold voice in my head. It was a voice I've never heard before. 

"Soyeon never loved you..." The sound echoed through my head and ringed in my ears. "You're so foolish..." The words were lapping over each other and it caused my head to hurt. "Give up. She's not yours." The last line finally stopped echoing, except it was worse. It was even louder than before, and it was clear. I don't know what happened after that, but the next thing I knew, Miyeon and Shuhua stared at me, looking concerned. I was still in the cave, in the moon. It was all a dream.

"Yuqi! Why were you mumbling 'no' earlier?" Shuhua asked with curiosity. I wiped the sweat off my forehead and shrugged. I didn't want to share this embarrassing dream with anyone. 

It seemed so real; the place, the voice, my love. Everything about it was just like reality. But why would I have a bizarre dream like that? Well, it didn't matter now. It was a dream, so it was fake. But still, my love for Soyeon...was great enough to be in my dreams? I guess so.