Love and Cigarettes

Chapter Two

"Are you really giving these clothes to me, Miriam?"

I anxiously watched my friend as she carelessly tossed several tops and skirts on her bed. Most of them were formal attires and they looked so expensive. I can't possibly accept them! Nakakahiya!

"Mukhang mamahalin ang mga ito." nag-aalala kong sabi habang tinitignan isa-isa ang mga damit. "Bakit mo ibibigay sa akin?"

"Well, they don't fit my body anymore." She gently caressed the bump on her tummy with a smile. Ngayon ko lang napansing mas halata na pala ang pagbubuntis niya. "Besides, I've already retired from the secretarial work. I won't be needing them any longer."

I nervously bit my nails. "Are you sure?"

"Ano ka ba?" Miriam chuckled heartily. "Para namang iba 'to. Friends give stuff to each other from time to time, you know."

My eyes watered with tears. I mentally thanked the heavens for blessing me with such a great friend. Not only did she help me find a new job, she's also taking care of me in the littlest ways possible.

Niyakap ko naman siya. "I love you so much, Miriam!"

"Girl, huwag OA. You act like I gave you a house and lot." natatawa niyang sambit at niyakap ako pabalik. "Kalma. Damit lang 'yan."

I sniffed. "You know how broke I am. I can't even afford to buy myself clothes like this, so it really means a lot to me. Thank you."

She gave me a warm smile. "You're welcome, Aria."

Miriam Glory Ramos-Cuevas was the closest friend that I had in college. Together with Denise and Prisma, we were in the same class for two consecutive years. Pare-pareho kaming Business Ad ngunit sa aming tatlo, ako lamang ang hindi nakapagtapos.

Despite that, the three of them never stopped hanging out with me. In fact, they encourage me to keep going despite the setbacks in my life. Especially Miriam, who closely monitors all my decisions.

Kahit kailan, hindi nila ipinaramdam na napag-iiwanan na ako.

"Wala ka ba talagang balak umuwi sa inyo, Aria?"

I shook my head frantically in response.

"Huwag mo sanang masamain ang sasabihin ko." Miriam heaved out a deep sigh before continuing. "Don't you think it's about time for you to go home? Whether you like it or not, you have to admit that you're still dependent on your family. Kailangan mo pa sila."

I bit my lower lip. "I don't want to go back, Miriam."

"Girl, lunukin mo na 'yang pride mo. Hindi ka bubuhayin niyan." napapailing niyang pangaral sa akin. "I understand the feud in your family, but it's normal to fight. Whatever happens, they're still your family and nothing can change that. Blood is thicker than water."

My eyebrows creased. "Not in my book. Sorry."

"Come on, Aria. Think about it." she insisted.

"I'd rather starve than come back to that house." I firmly stated then slumped myself on her bed. "I'm always the main topic every time we eat. They keep comparing me to Althea. Tapos sinusumbat nila sa akin lahat ng gamit, pagkain at damit na ibinibigay nila."

My throat hurts. I don't really like talking about this.

"Palamunin daw ako. Walang silbi. Bobo at pangit. They even stopped paying for my tuition in college and said that I shouldn't bother studying. Wala naman daw akong mararating sa buhay kaya mas mabuting maging yaya na lang ako ng mga pamangkin ko."

Miriam consoled me by continuously patting my head.

I sighed. "It's not like I asked to be born, you know? They're the ones who made the choice of bearing a child. Responsibilidad nilang buhayin ako. Bakit kailangan nilang isumbat sa akin lahat?"