Not Quite Enough

8.April

All The Small Things // blink-182

Nico dropped me off at the salon and I escaped inside as fast as I could. Now I'm staring out the window waiting for the guy to show up. I'm anticipating it. Practically holding my breath waiting for his headlights to turn into the small parking lot outside the front entrance. And the sad thing is, I think I'd recognize his headlights immediately.

I don't want this. I don't want to be hanging on to my sanity because I'm obsessing over this guy. But here I am, totally thinking back over every second in his garage. Not only the way he looked at me, the way his body heat felt when he started to lean in, because was he about to kiss me? I wanted him to kiss me, no lie. I can admit that to myself. But it's a freaking bad idea, that is also true. And that's not the worst part! Because I was equally intrigued by the way he looked at my car, at my baby. Like he loved her too. Like he saw my car for what it represents in my life; freedom. I shouldn't be so excited for the way he drooled over the messed up engine, but I am. Totally light headed type of excitement. I am picturing it and my heart is racing. It feels like he appreciates the time he has with me, and that he appreciates me for who I am, not for what I can do for him.

I knew it. This guy has already blown up my world. I need to find some other distraction from how he makes me feel, like right now.

I cross my arms and pace in front of the door. It's only ten minutes to nine, so he isn't late, but I'm already anxiously awaiting Nico's presence. Not good at all. I turn back to see Shaylyn cleaning her combs. That's my job, and I feel terrible that I've been so distracted all night that I never got to them.

"Oh man, I'm sorry Shaylyn. The night got away from me."

Shaylyn just smirks. "Or is it that hottie that dropped you off running through your mind?" She looks up in time to see me blush, gulp and turn back to the window. "It's okay, April. I've been there. I couldn't concentrate for a second when I met my guy. Jerome had me almost shaving heads rather than trimming edges I was so gone."

"No, it's nothing like that. He's just working on my car while I'm here, so I've been worried that my baby will be worse than when he started."

Shaylyn laughs. "Sure, April. Whatever." I see her shake her head while continuing to clean up her station. "By the way, Gladys was asking about you this morning."

"Gladys?" I say, glad for the distraction. This is exactly what I needed. "That older lady who gave me her calling card?" I haven't looked at it since she handed it to me, but it's still in my bag. I reach in and root around until I grip the edges of a small card. I pull it out and read her contact information once again.

"Yeah. She's a sweet old thing. Not snooty like some of the women in her position could be."

"Position?" I ask, even though I can guess. The woman had some expensive accessories. She might be a customer at a lower priced salon but her bag alone screamed money.

"She's got money. That much I know. Gladys has opened up a little more, but mostly she asked questions about you. How old you are, how long you've worked here...that kind of thing."

"Should I be creeped out?" Older ladies don't spend that much time thinking about random teenagers, do they?

"No, she's sweet. Harmless. I think she just needs people to talk to. The woman comes in once a week for a do but doesn't need to that often. She just needs someone to listen to her stories, now that I've got her talking."

I stare at the card. What could it hurt? Talking to someone who just needs a friend isn't so bad. I could have used one myself over the last few months. Although being lonely isn't nearly the same as being ignored.