The Fallen Invader

Chapter 5: Clones

Another day, another awkward dinner conversation with Dad.

While I am grateful that he started to make more time for Gaz and I to make up for how absent he was when we were growing up, more time with Dad means that he has more time to judge me.

"Son, have you decided which field of science you're going to study in college?"

"Dad, no offense, but you know I'm not all that into science."

"Don't tell me you still want to pursue your crazy obsession with hunting nonexistent supernatural creatures."

I didn't have to answer. We both knew where this conversation was going.

"I understand that you find enjoyment in your obsession, but it's just not practical. You have a brilliant mind, don't let it go to waste. You could really make a difference in the world."

Yeah, okay. The countless times I saved the entire planet are meaningless. Got it.

During another long period of silence, I was left alone with my thoughts, and I realized something.

"Hey, Dad? Why do you want me to be a scientist so badly? And... why don't you ever try and talk Gaz into it? I mean, she's in the robotics club at skool, that's sciency."

"Leave me out of this." Gaz said with a groan.

Dad looked back and forth between the two of us. "Kids... it's time I told you something..."

Before I knew it, I was running down the street to Zim's base. We hadn't spoken for about a week and a half, and I doubted he had any intention of talking to me, but I didn't know where else to turn.

"Zim? Are you there? I need to vent." I said on the verge of tears, knocking on the door. To my surprise, the door swung right open, and Zim was standing there, looking displeased.

"Oh. You're back."

"I know you don't want me bothering you, but my Dad just told me something crazy, and I don't know who else to talk to about it, so if you could just pretend to care for a few minutes, I'd really appreciate it."

Similar to the last time we met, we sat ourselves down on the couch. "Alright, let's get this over with."

"I'm... my Dad, he... I'm not..."

"Spit it out already, Dib-stink!"

"I'M A CLONE OF MY DAD!!!"

Zim stared at me for a few seconds, then burst out laughing. "Is that all? Everybody on Irk is a clone. We've reproduced that way for generations. It's normal!"

"Well it's not normal for Earth! I don't... I don't feel like a real person... I'm just a copy of my Dad, that's why he wants me to be a scientist. But... I guess I came out wrong..."

At that, Zim stopped laughing. "You're... defective?" He asked, shakily.

"That's a harsh way of putting it, but yeah, I guess so."

"On my planet, defectives are killed. Their PAKs are erased and discarded, wiping the memory of their entire existence."

"Great, thanks for rubbing salt in the wound." I said, tears streaming down my face.

"Eh? What salt? No, no, what I mean to say is... I may be defective as well. I was unable to fulfill my intended purpose. I'm lucky to be alive right now."

I nodded. "Yeah, but it still hurts to let down someone you look up to. My Dad loves me, but no matter what, he'll always be disappointed in how I turned out. He tells me he's proud of me, but he still doesn't believe anything I say. And now, knowing what high expectations he had when he created me... I really can't blame him for being disappointed."

"Heh, I hate to admit this, but your attempts to stop me were quite impressive. Remember when we had that epic space battle? You took a rocket to Mercury just to stop me from squishing out all organic life!"

I wiped my tears. Talking to Zim was surprisingly comforting, though I didn't expect it to last.

He avoided my gaze as he gently ran his claws across his antenna. "You know, I've been reconsidering your offer. Your superior intelligence is quite admirable, and the increase in height you've acquired over the years implies that you are a highly respectable individual. Anyway, it appears we both lack purpose at the moment. Perhaps we could make it our mission as two defectives on this hideous planet to find a new one."

Zim's genuine smile was unreal. I wasn't quite sure if I trusted it yet, but after going so long not knowing who to trust, I was willing to take a chance.

"So... you're a clone too, huh? Who are you a clone of?" I asked, changing the subject.

"Oh, no one actually knows. Random DNA is selected to make the organic bodies, and then the PAKs are attached. Our actual personalities exist within the PAKs though."

"If you don't naturally reproduce, do you just come into existence as a full-grown adult, or do you start out as a baby like I did?"

"Oh, I was a baby. And a cute one at that. We call our young Smeets."

"That's adorable."

"Indeed."

"Do you guys have birthdays?"

"Birth... days?"

This question and answer session went on for... I don't even know how long, but it was almost 11 at night by the time I got home. To my surprise, the moment I walked through the door, Dad hugged me.

"Son, I'm sorry I didn't tell you sooner. Please don't scare me like that again."

"And I'm sorry I ran off. It's just... I know you had certain expectations of me, but even though I'm your clone, I'm still my own person."

He nodded. "Yes, I understand that now. It was foolish of me to assume that my personality would carry over to you. Clearly, it doesn't matter. Just look at Clembrane, he's no scientist, but he found success as a TV chef!"

A few years back, Clembrane went off to Hollywood to become a celebrity chef. He has his own show, "Cooking with Clembrane." He only ever makes pudding, though.

"So... you're not gonna pressure me to be a scientist?" I asked.

"No. Besides, I'm still fairly young, I'll have plenty of time to find a suitable successor to take over Membrane Labs! Also, thanks for the tip about Gaz. We talked after you left, and she expressed interest in helping me out!"

"Heh, that's great. Hey, wait a second. If I'm a clone, where did Gaz come from?"

Dad laughed as if the answer was obvious. "Science, of course!"

That was the only answer I was ever gonna get. My theory is that she's the result of some genetic experiment to create the most intimidating human being possible.

I went to sleep that night feeling just a little bit better about everything. Oddly enough, it was thanks to Zim. That whole thing about how Irkens are cloned, but their personalities are separate entities from their bodies, it really cleared some things up about why I'm not a carbon copy of my Dad, even if I look like him.

And... the "defective" thing. I couldn't help but feel bad for the little guy. Being born into the world as a normal, flawed individual, only to be treated like a monster. It was certainly something I've felt before. Sure, I know I'm not a great person, but do I really deserve to be treated like garbage all the time? No. And neither does Zim.