Asterisk*

Laundry and Luxury*

*In regards to both of them being found in the laundry room 

Sunshine depleted among rainbows,

A freak show in town,

Sunset valley turned grey,

Bridges bonded and broken.

Wish.

Wash.

Flop.

Marcus

Procrastination should be considered an art form. To put it quite simply, sometimes it's harder to put off doing something than actually doing it. Every time I think about calling home, I promise myself that I would do it later in the day. It's been a week. I haven't called anyone. Nova texted me, which was weird. I didn't text her back. I didn't want to talk to anyone. It seemed like no one wanted to talk to me either. Except Nova, that is. But she'll talk to the floor if she's bored.

I don't even know why I was upset. Sometimes you're just in the mood to sulk around all day, pretending to go to sleep when you don't need to. I felt alone here. There were so many kinds of people, all saying different things, doing different things, being these free people that I could never be. At the same time, being free is fleeting. How long is it until they stop being like that? Then we're essentially the same people, slightly out of our mind eighteen year olds that want a degree in the easiest way possible.

Laundry had been building up in the corner of my room for ages now. I promised myself I would do it two days ago. I'm currently sitting bored in a chair. It would be so easy to get up and just take a quick trip to the laundry room, but no. Procrastination.

I wondered how long it would take for me to actually stop putting off important life decisions. I was supposed to have this shit figured out already. Dash did. My parents did. Why can't I? I just felt like a broken toy left in the corner. Everyone around me was shiny and new, enthralling. I was boring now, lifeless, and the batteries no longer worked. No use for me anymore.

Even though Kadance and Aiden were quite possibly one of the worst choices to hang out with, I felt like I fit in somewhere. They were all so confused that it made me feel like I remotely had my life together, even though I didn't. I know that's not right, but I can't help it. Sometimes I do things without even noticing I do them until after. I'll just slip out a better test grade than I actually got, pretend like my brother and I still have the closest relationship, and telling people that I don't gorge on ice cream at 3 am because I feel sad. These are just things I do. I didn't even think about it until I realized I'm not supposed to be doing these things.

I kind of wondered what being high would feel like. Dash once came home really high. I think it was LSD or something because it seemed way stronger than pot. If drunk words are sober thoughts, I'll take sober words any day. I know it's sugar coated and fake, but it sounds nice. If I want to look past the barrier, I can. If not, I can pretend I don't notice anything other than the sickly sweet sugar in front of me. I would never do it because I would be way too freaked out to do so. But what if they led to some crazy self discovery? I don't know. I guess I haven't got that desperate yet. Maybe one day I will be.

After watching the minute hand tick around the clock one more time, I decided I might as well do my laundry. If I was feeling good, then I would even call back home. Maybe respond to Nova. Never mind, that would be too creepy. I stuffed all my clothes in a plastic laundry basket that I had brought. There were already cracks in the bottom from when I hit an especially nasty pothole on the way here. My roommate would probably be glad that I was gone. Any time I go to the bathroom, he tries to sneak his girlfriend in. If he simply talked to me, he would know that I didn't care, and everything could be much easier for us both. You know, I could actually avoid staying in the bathroom longer than I have to because I know they're tossing through the bedsheets.