unbreak my heart, taejin

four

Seokjin promises himself he will never drink again. It does more harm than good. Seokjin gulps a glass of water before popping the pill into his mouth, hoping that the headache would subside before he reaches the set. He curses his reflection in the mirror. His cheeks were flushed red and the dark circles under his eyes were prominent. The makeup artist would have a hard time today. He rummages through his fridge for some snacks as he has no energy to cook a proper meal. Being unsuccessful, Seokjin convinces himself to visit the small café near the set and grab coffee and a donut. He looks at the piece of paper stuck on his refrigerator and crosses out a few sentences and adds some changes. Satisfied by the new algorithm Seokjin manages to pull himself out of the house

seokjin's updated algorithm to life (subjected to change)
1. wake up and call your best friend.
2.talk about how you miss your sugar glider pets and manage to gain sympathy from your best friend.
3. cook and eat a healthy breakfast and rush to work. you can eat unhealthy from the cafe if you are running late
4. greet jungkookie as soon as you arrive at work and treat him with your home cooked healthy breakfast.
5. ask hoseok about his day as you change your outfit and get your makeup done.
6. do what you love doing, i.e. acting.
7. remind yourself that all conversation and dialogues shared with your colleague is an act.
even if it feels real and the circumstances coincide remember it isn't. he is trying to mess with you
8. avoid all eye contact with the said colleague whenever possible
9. do not space out and think about your past with the said colleague.
10. drive home as soon as work is over. no hanging out with jungkook after the shoot, said colleague will be there too. no, don't change your plans for someone else. do what you like. hang out with jungkookie
11. try to practice the dialogues for the next day.
12. have a light dinner and listen to music. also listen to your best friends music, it's good!
its okay to listen to your and his music that you created together too. you are allowed to feel bad and cry sometimes, not too much though
13. try to stop thinking about the said colleagues' smile and fall asleep but fail miserably and instead spend the night reminiscing about the past. and actually sleep. or you will look awful the next morning and you can't afford that. avoid drinking at all costs
14. repeat from step 1 again.

Seokjin's phone buzzed in his pockets distracting his attention from the piece of paper on which his dialogues were typed out. "Yoongi-chi. This is a first", Seokjin giggled. Yoongi groaned, "Good Morning Hyungie- I was just worried about you, you know. Since you didn't call me-" he spoke softly. Seokjin smiled, "Right Yoongi- you were. Sorry I didn't. I woke up a little late and had to hurry", Seokjin explains. "It is alright. Are you okay though? You sound very sleepy. Did you not sleep well", Yoongi talked mindlessly. Seokjin simply hummed avoiding the question. Yoongi did not press in, "Also, Hyungie, I think you should know this. Namjoon and I are adopting-", Seokjin immediately cut Yoongi short with an apparently overdramatic cough but Seokjin was genuinely shocked. "Adopting. What- Are you sure. No because, I totally support you but are you sure that you want to do that at this stage of your life", Seokjin rambled. Yoongi simply laughed, "Relax Hyungie. We aren't adopting a child. We aren't even adopting a dog or a cat. We are just adopting plants. Since neither Namjoon and I are patient enough to grow one from the seeds but we are confident we can manage already grown plants", Yoongi explained excitedly. Seokjin took a long breath, "You really had me at the first part but either way Yoongi, I am really happy for you and Namjoon too. I am sure he would be very delighted to finally bring those plant babies home", Seokjin spoke. Yoongi buzzed happily. Their conversation cut short as Yoongi had to leave to collect the plants along with namjoon.

-04-

It was a snowy winter evening. Not just a normal snowy evening, it was Seokjin's twenty third birthday. Cooped under the blanket fort Seokjin had pulled together, with his favourite jellies loaded beside him and anime playing, he waited for Taehyung to return. "You can't celebrate your birthday without a cake and since I can't bake I will go and buy one for you immediately", Taehyung whined. Seokjin was too whipped to deny so he let Taehyung leave. It was over forty minutes now and Taehyung wasn't back. Seokjin looked at the empty space beside him with a sad smile. It was incredulous, how Seokjin couldn't stay away from Taehyung even for an hour. He feared the day Taehyung would have to leave him for a longer duration. But Seokjin hadn't imagined, even in his nightmare, that there would never come a day where Taehyung would leave him forever.