Dreamnap oneshots (Old ;-;)

Self-Hatred🌧️☁️

TW: Body shaming, slurs, self harm, thoughts of suicide (all angst stories will be marked with 🌧️ and all fluff with ☁️ but this story is kinda both)

I opened a healing emotional scar from my past to write this so please don't let it flop ;w;

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SapNap's POV

It's been a while since Dream and I have announced our relationship officially and everything was okay. There was more support than hate... at first at least. I was the only one to find out the true intensity and cruelty of Dreams 'simps'. It first only started as them sending me fanart of dream breaking up with me. That didn't bother me too much. I just ignored it and payed attention to the fanart of us cuddling and doing other cutesy stuff from our shippers. 

Then the hate got more intense. They would send me threats; saying things like "If you two don't break up soon, we'll hunt you down and curb stomp you!" I just blocked the user and moved on, though I will admit, that one kind of scared me. Then came the death threats.... and those are what sent me over the edge. It scared me and hurt me that people would want to kill me for just trying to be happy. 

I turned off my phone and set it aside, hugging my knees to my chest and sobbing into them.  I cried for a while, until I felt sleepy. Dream had the 12-9 pm work shift so I was at home alone and had nothing better to do. I crawled into bed and fell asleep, my eyes red and puffy from crying.

 I had a nightmare, Dream shoved me off of him when I went to hug him. "What the hell are you doing?!" He shouted. "I-I was just giving you a hug-!" Dream growled. "Why would I want any kind of affection from a fat, ugly mistake of a human like you?!" He snapped. "I-" He cut me off before I could finish. "Ugh, we're over." 

Dream walked away towards what looked like our group of friends. Then... he kissed George. I can't even be upset... George is perfect for him. He's thin, smart, cute (Not a ship), is popular among everyone, and actually has his shit together. While I... I'm fat, pretty stupid, ugly as all hell, underrated, and my self confidence and worth are both lacking. George deserves him... not me. I deserve to be lonely for life. God, I'm such a disgusting creature. 

I shot awake, tears streaming down my face. I sobbed into my arms for a few minutes then remembered the blade I had extracted from and old razor. I looked to the left of my bedside table to the drawer it resided in. Opening the drawer and taking it out, heavy insults and thoughts rang through my head. Useless. Ugly. Fat. Waste Of Space. I left a cut on my thigh for each insult that rang through my head. 

When I was finished there were 26 cut in total that littered my thighs. To prevent passing out from blood loss, I wrapped some bandages around my thighs tight to stop the bleeding. I tied the bandages off and  grabbed a pair of jeans from the clothing drawer me and Dream shared across the room. I put them on to hide the bandages and i went back to bed, still sobbing. 

I had another nightmare, but this one didn't wake me up. it was just shouting, screaming, and yelling. People shaming me... telling me things I already know. "You're worthless!" "Your ugly!" "Your fat!" "You don't deserve him, f***ot!" "You should go kill yourself!" All I could do was sob and nod at the things they said. I agree. I don't deserve him. I don't deserve to live. I hate them, but I understand what they mean.

Something happens, though... they fade away? I look around but the room is changed. It's no longer pitch black and full of hatred. It a pure white room and it feels... safe. My headache fades and I just feel dazed and confused. I feel that heavy feeling in your eyelids when you're tired. But... wasn't I already asleep? I lay back on the white floor and close my eyes. 

Nothing happens until... "I love you, baby!" Dream?!  I wait patiently to hear if what I thought I heard was really him. It came again. "You're so cute, Sappy~!" It's him! My Dream is here! But... does he mean those words? "I'll protect you no matter what, Sap!" I remember the first time he said that to me... we were cuddling and I was having a small panic attack. "My cute baby boy~!" My face heated up at those words. I remember when he said those too... it was the first time we... the only thing I'm going to say is I have a thing for praise. 

God, I want him to hold me again.  And I got exactly what I wanted. I woke up from my dream (hehehhehehe puns-) to find my boyfriend holding me close to his chest. My face felt wet, meaning he knows I've been crying in my sleep... and he was awake already too. I shifted a bit and wrapped my arms around him. He looked at me from his phone and set it down.

"Baby... another nightmare?" I nod and cuddle into him. He kisses me all over and tells me sweet nothings. "What did I do to deserve you...?" I mumbled, but he heard me. "Nothing. And you don't have to, baby. Just love me..." He tensed then... and I know he saw them. My legs... I was wearing shorts. "Love yourself..." I was grateful he didn't say much of anything about the cuts. He just held me and gave me all the attention and love he could until we were both exhausted. 

Maybe he's right... I don't even know those other people and I'm listening to them but not him?! God I can be stupid. It doesn't matter anymore. All I want to do right now is sleep in his arms. And that's exactly what I did.

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1029 words.... lordy -^- 

I am hella tired from writing this... soooo-

yea I'm gonna go pass tf out now....

Thanks for reading -w-