In Time//Elavan

~30~

I miss you

Liz, I love you

Liz

Liz

Liz notice me. I love you

She grunts loudly before tossing her phone off her bed and burying her face in her hands. Her phone kept pinging to tell her that Avan sent more texts as she typed down a couple more sentences for her review of Mitch Albom's newest book. She kept her eyes on the screen but her attention was on the irritable noise eliciting from her phone.

The pinging silenced, and she was about to sigh in relief when it started ringing instead. Not being able to take it anymore, Liz picks up her phone and grudgingly answers the phone.

"The fuck do you want?"

"You're being mean," he replies and she could practically see the pout on his face.

"Yeah, no shit," she rolls her eyes. "What do you want, Avan?"

"I just wanted to check on you and make sure you're doing okay because I love you."

Since Avan has said that he loves her over a week ago, he hasn't stopped saying it. It was like a mantra or a chant that he religiously prayed to the wonder of her presence.

She didn't understand how he could manage to say it a million times a day and still mean it. Liz said it once and never said it again. Repetition takes the meaning away from things and Liz didn't want to give or receive empty I love you's. The very thought of it scared her. She didn't like to think about the fact that Avan might one day stop meaning his I love you's.

"Stop saying that."

"Stop saying what?" he asks. "I love you?"

"Yeah, that."

"But I do love you. I love you a lot."

"Avan," she warns.

"Liz," he copies her. "Why do you never say it back anymore?"

"I don't feel like it," she shrugs.

"So you don't feel like you love me anymore?" his voice was soft and desperate, almost like a broken child. It did not waiver nor shake but the stillness of his tone broke hearts worse than any tremor could.

"You know it's not like that."

"Are you sure? Maybe you're starting to rethink it. I would rather you tell me the truth now," his voice doesn't change. "I would be okay, little one. Just tell me. People say things they don't mean all the time. I won't be mad."

"Stop saying that!" she bursts out. "Just because I'm not saying it, doesn't mean it's not true! Stop being needy."

"Sorry."

Liz shuts her eyes tight as his side of the call becomes silent. Ever since their feelings got involved in their relationship, it was like Avan became ten times needier. It was great when she needed someone to talk to and when she's had a long day; but in the middle of a work day, it had the tendency to be a little annoying.

"Av," she sighs. "Avan, are you still there?"

"Yeah."

"Av, I love you," she whispers. "I'm sorry."

"Can I come over?"

She smiles into her phone subtly, "Sure."

Avan understood that it was hard for her to trust herself when it came to love and emotions in general. He knew that he would have to ease her into a relationship if she wanted to be in one. There was no rush and he didn't want to pressure her. If she wanted to take things slow, then slow it will be.