Sertraline

Overdose (Part I)

One,
The first for you,
My dearest mother.
Don't cry,
I don't deserve your tears,
Salt doesn't deserve to be spilt,
For someone so incompetent.
I promise you, you did your best,
But I suppose your best means nothing
When dealing with a lost cause.

Two,
My father.
Stop drinking,
Keep working hard
And love your family more than the world.
Family isn't as fragile as it may seem to you.
Put as much effort in at home,
As you do at work.
Help your kids,
And smile more often.

Three,
My beautiful Sister,
I'm sorry,
I know you needed your brother to be strong,
If not for himself,
Then for you instead.
You needed someone to guide you,
Through lands they'd travelled not too long ago.

Four,
Little angel,
Keep being precious,
Your innocence is radiating
You're purity is glimmering.
And always remember,
That I love you more,
Than you can ever love me.

Five,
My brother,
I haven't seen you in so long,
And I suppose I never will again,
Knowing the future,
I missed you so much,
Even if the rest of them didn't.
You voice echoes in my ears,
Even now.
From that one night,
One of our last together.

Six,
Dear friend,
Thanks,
For everything
You were great,
Though your feelings were greater
And my confusion only grew
Fueled by signs and signals I couldnt understand

Seven,
Lost one,
You left when I needed you,
Tried to make comparisons,
Never knew how much I cared,
How much I fell for you.
In the end, I needed you,
And you were never there.

Eight,
The boys,
The guys that made me feel normal,
Like I never had to pretend again,
And good things always come to an end,
Like our many music sessions,
And gaming instead of learning.

Nine,
My buddy,
You were the one,
That I should have realised was always there,
My true best friend,
Not the fake one who left before I could even speak.
So for that, I'm sorry.

Ten,
Ten minutes now,
That's how long is left,
Before the vomit rises
And I start to choke.

Eleven,
My Queen,
I'm sorry,
I so obviously failed you
Though at least we can be together,
Once I finally fall into the void.

Twelve,
This is it,
My favourite band singing out,
Waiting for me to return to the earth
Its finally over.

-- For those reading, don't be alarmed, this poem is a mix of fictional and hypothetical. It's something I've thought about yes, but there are plans for the second part to link to some of the other poems.

- Stay safe, Ren