Lovers

Ch.27: Looking Forward to the Change

Looking Forward to the Change- by Hockey Dad

"I miss you like good health, but I'm not the one to tell. And there's nothing you can say. I'll just let it change, take off the restraints. Looking forward to the change."

Dawn POV

Laptop. Check. Cell phone, check—Lauren's number. Check. My hands are clammy as I hesitate to press her phone contact. I would text her, but I don't know if she'd respond. Calling is more direct. More serious. However, if she lets it ring and never calls back, I can't force her to do anything. Leaving a message will give her time to think, and she might not want to see me.

"My lovely Donavan," Lana tears me out from my thoughts as she stirs her lukewarm coffee from the massive amounts of creamer. "You've been staring at that screen far too long."

"I know," I groan, "but what am I to say?"

"A simple can we talk... I'm in town would suffice. Texting is easier." Ben suggests as he enters the dining room.

"Yes, but she may not answer."

"Or she might," he assures.

"Last time I talked to her, I tripped her and embarrassed her in front of everyone. It's not like she didn't deserve it, but now I feel bad."

Lana shakes her head in dismay, "But didn't you tell Ben and me on the ride here that she ruined any chance of happiness for potentially catapulting and changing a reality that could have been? Trust me; if she's a human being, she still feels horrible about what she's done."

"Okay." I sigh, opening her contact and typing precisely what Ben said.

Me: I'm in town. Can we talk. In-person.

I add the second part. This is not my first choice, but I know Lauren. If it's something she doesn't want to talk about, she will keep quiet. It's much easier to pressure someone the truth in person.

It doesn't take that long, maybe 15 minutes, before she responded.

Lauren: surprise to hear from you. Sure. I work at the Mall on the fifth and Belmont. Food court. My first break is in an hour.

I show my screen to Lana. She gasps, almost choking the last of the scrambled egg that she made on my stove. I muster a smile when she winks at me. Ben comes around the corner, his hair wet from a shower, "what's the plan?"

"We're meeting at a mall," I announce.

—-

Lauren never had a job. She relied on her parent's money for everything. She was considered the wealthy friend, much to no ones surprise. My dad has a steady hand, or should I say had one. Mom was a home nurse—a steady paycheck. And I babysat twice a week until JC compromised that. Currently, I'm living off my FAFSA, considering my father's imprisonment lowered my household income.

But why does Lauren have a job? That was my question? She was mommy and daddy's little girl. If only they knew their daughter.

The ride isn't long, much to my disappointment. She works close to home.

Ben and Lana sense my uneasiness and try to cheer me up by cracking jokes. Still, my mind won't shut off from the anxiety. I don't know my goals for being here exactly. An investigation of some sorts, and I expect her to help me. She owes me nothing, most would say differently, but when you have lived a life like mine, you begin to realize that it's not everyone's fault for why you hurt. It's not yours either; it's just life. Punching your stomach until it bleeds with worry.

I've done terrible things, out of jealousy, out of my hate, anger-- all the above. Towards Serena, my mother, and even Jake. I'm not a saint, and I'm well aware of it. Fuck, I haven't spoken to Reese in months. I've passed her house twice since being in town, and it crosses my mind like an earthquake, but somehow it's only for a second. Then I'm back to stressing about Jake and my takedown of Dawson.