house of black

chapter 10: sink or swim

September 1st, Hogwarts, 1972

Sirius had never been so happy to be anywhere before. The long summer break he had spent cooped up in Grimmauld place had been agonising. He had minimal communication with James and Peter due to the limitations his mother imposed. She did not share his belief that these people were good enough friends for her son. Sirius begged to differ. He had been allowed to see James only twice during the summer and the visits felt far too short and far between.

James' house had been a dream, and his parents made Sirius feel welcome, despite his mothers icy disposition when greeting them. James' father had allowed the boys to share a butterbeer and offered to referee their one on one game of Quidditch. His mother had a kind way of looking at you and always nodded along to Sirius and James; stories, no matter how fantastical seeing a Griffin in the garden sounded. It made going home to Grimmauld place that much more disappointing.

Now he wouldn't have to worry about his mother until next summer, as he had no intention of going home until then, even if she came here herself. James had agreed to stay with him except over Christmas because he and his parents were going on a holiday.

But it didn't matter, this year his brother would be joining them. Another piece in their friendship group- a mini Sirius. He had already told James, Remus and Peter all about his younger brother and their adventures in the year before Hogwarts. But over the summer Regulus seemed distant, distracted and more than a little afraid of the prospect of attending Hogwarts.

Summer had been a turbulent time for the Black Family with the betrayal of Andromeda. Narcissa had been shipped off to Grimmauld Place for a week after it happened so that her parents could get their affairs in order. Sirius had watched her sit in silence for a week and cry in secret at night when she thought no one could hear her. Sirius looked over at the Slytherin table to see her sitting there. She looked just as thin and sickly as he remembered from the summer. Her friends could be seen chattering around her happily but she seemed to want no part in their affairs. Sirius, although not liking his cousin very much, could not help but feel sorry for her loss.

He on the other hand had received letters from Andromeda with pictures of her new life with Ted. She looked happier, freer, just how Sirius felt at Hogwarts. He wondered if he should share them with Narcissa, but quickly dismissed the idea. Perhaps she would be unhappy that she had not received any letters of her own. Her other sister, Bellatrix was no help, of course. But there was something about her now, he could tell that she even made his mother uneasy. The way she spoke about the war to come, this idea that pure blooded wizards had something to fight for. He knew his mother was a blood purist, she reminded him at every opportunity. But his cousin's dedication and dedication to this great commander was something else. When Bellatrix wasn't preaching her wartime stories she was tormenting her younger sister and gloating in Andromeda's banishment.

Sirius didn't know what he would do if he lost his brother in such a fashion. He may not be as refined in his grief as his blonde-haired cousin. He would shout and hit the falls to physically fight his way back to a reunion with Regulus. Yes, that's what he'd do.

The doors swung open and the group of first years poured in. Sirius sat up from his place beside James to watch. Regulus was in the middle of the crown, robes on neatly and his hair pushed off of his face. His face formed a tentative frown and his hands fidgeted in the sleeves on his robes.

Looking up at the hat perched on the stool filled Regulus with dread. He had seen firsthand the reaction of his mother when Sirius was placed in Gryffindor and the rage mixed with disappointment which followed. What would happen to him if he was placed in a similar fashion?

He did not even glance towards his brother, who he could see watching him out of the corner of his eye. Instead he looked over at the Slytherin table where he was hoping to be seated. Maybe if he crossed his fingers and his toes the sorting had would sense his desperation and put him where he so longed to be.

The same witch, Professor McGonagall led the students to a stop and peered over her spectacles at the list of names. "When I call your name you will accent the steps and be sorted into your houses. Please be prompt." she instructed. "Alice Fortescue." A small, dirty blonde-haired girl ascended the steps, almost tripping on the last one before taking her seat. Regulus thought he may be ill. He shifted anxiously in his place and wiped his sweaty palms on his robes. His eyes kept flicking between the hat and the Slytherin table nervously until his name was called.

"Regulus Black." The professor called.

Sirius tensed as his younger brother climbed up the stairs in a measured fashion. Regulus wanted nothing more than to run. The hat was placed on his head and hummed thoughtfully.

"Ah, A familiar name." it said. "Loyal in nature, ambitious, yes you're as easy to sort as your ancestors... Slytherin!"

Regulus exhaled in relief and Sirius' world shattered. This is not what he wanted or planned. Regulus was supposed to be in Gryffindor, like him, and they were going to oppose their mother together. This was wrong- all wrong. But Regulus looked nothing short of thrilled. He hurried to the Slytherin table where he was nodded at by his peers, including Severus Snape, causing Sirius to seethe. Even Narcissa leaned down to offer him her words of congratulations.

"It's okay Sirius, he's still your brother and can be in our group" James whispered to him.

"He won't now, they've got him" Sirius mumbled.

"What does that even mean?" Peter asked from his other side.

"Means he isn't a family disappointment, so why would he want to associate with one?" he said bitterly.

"Don't say that. You even said your brother isn't like that." James retorted.

"He is when it comes to my mother." he sighed.

It was only then when he met eyes from Regulus across the dining hall. His light eyes were filled with longing and almost regret as he observed Sirius. To reach out, Sirius offered his brother a subtle wave and a half-hearted thumbs up, to which Regulus nodded and looked down at his empty plate. Sirius sighed.

This would be the end of them, he thought. No more sneaking to the attic for jam, no more fighting dragons and warlocks. No more he and Regulus against the world. Perhaps it was now he and Regulus against each other.

Maybe he should have had more sympathy towards his cousin who lost a sister. Maybe people would have been kinder to him upon losing his brother.

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{Hello, sorry for the long absence- my life has been absolutely crazy for the last week! Also thankyou for all the comments on this story as well as my lucissa one! It makes my day to read them xx}