Amaguji : oneshots and headcanons 🤍🦎

[ vent chapter ]

         
!Angst!
Trigger warning: mentions of s3lf h4rm , m4nipulat1on and ab/s3
i've been feeling pretty sh1t within the past few days and i can't stop crying so i wrote this chapter lol
Yes yes , I am aware this may be similar to duckies part 2 but then again this is written in more depth and it was more for me to convey how I felt into a chapter hhhhh
also, i apologise that i used my emotions as an excuse of a chapter- i just wanted to get out how i felt.

-

the anthropologist frantically shook in fear and panic , his tearful eyes filling up minute by minute just like a rising ocean while soft sobs escaped him.
Shinguji had been like this for the past three hours. Curled up in a ball. Overthinking his sorrows. Scared of what she might do again.

These raced rapidly throughout his cramped up mind - being alone right now probably wasn't the greatest thing for him and his thoughts... he didn't want it to end up like last time.
He didn't want.. didn't even dare to think of entering that bathroom once again, watching the blood slowly drip down his exposed arms. He didn't want the cold harsh painful stings that came along with it. He couldn't  even bare having to re bandage his hands. every. single. day.

but.. thats what she wanted right?? Then,, wasn't that the right thing to do? To watch the pain seep in once again. The stinging ,agonising ,horrific , petrifying pain. She would've wanted this. It was all for her. She would've loved him for this. So why did he feel so helpless and cold. So numb yet so full of emotion and pain.
Pain.

The word pounded through his head like a thousand bass tones blocking out any other sound - the sobs growing fainter and fainter until it stopped. Silence. Silence. Finally, it was quiet. The thoughts had gone... silence silence silence silence silence silence silen-
knock.
Hm?
Again. Knock.

"Kiyo? Are you alright? You've been in your dorm for the past three lessons.. I just want to know if you're still okay-"
There it was. The only comfort left. The soft warming tone that could brighten anyone's day.
It seemed to shine through the thickening fog of low base screams and sobbing : it was sweet.
Though there was a hint of worry added to the voice it still drove every panic and nerve from previous hours away.. the tension loosening within the atmosphere.
It was so gentle so kind so-

Knock.
Knock.
"Kiyo.. I'm worried- please answer, even if it's just a simple knock back as a yes, that will be enough. I just need a sign that you're still well and safe,, alright?"
The voice's concern had now risen , only tempting Korekiyo to the point as to where he had to do something: he couldn't drive away his sense of comfort.

With a silent minute of sniffling and tear wiping , he had managed to bring himself up from the - now warm - bedsheet blankets and forward toward the interior door of his fairly average sized dormitory room.
The handle was exceedingly cold from the lack of contact yet they hadn't effected Shinguji. Thanks to the bandages, of course.
A quiet creak appeared for a millisecond just as the door slowly but surely flung open in his direction.

The creases and corners of his eyes were still stained with tears. But fortunately , not one was shed.
"Amami... I'm,"
He paused.
"I'm so sorry, I hadn't meant to cause all of this worry and panic yet I stupidly ran out of the lesson because I couldn't face my feelings just like she had told me to and I cannot comprehend the amounts of emotion that in fact I just burst into tears and if there's anything I can do to make it up to you and everyone I will I promise I just-"

a finger placed lightly onto his lips, his mask removed from earlier events.
"Kiyo, please don't apologise, please don't ever apologise for your feelings, it isn't your fault, you couldn't help any of this, I'm just glad you're here now and I know that you're safe"
Rantaro had now pulled Shinguji into a loving embrace, the feeling of sweet warmth returning to the atmosphere around them. His grip tightened slightly , Korekiyo now melting into his arms , shortly sobbing again after.

"Hey.. it's alright, just take slow breaths okay? I've got you, you are safe"
Amami's tone of voice softened while Shinguji nodded in response : being comforted had made him feel a lot better but he was still overwhelmed by all of the events of the previous days.
The haunting memory of her hadn't helped at all.

"How about we head into the room and sit down, we can get you some water and talk about it if needed, does that sound alright to you?"
Rantaro tried helping as best as he could, still feeling highly sympathetic for the anthropologist's current situation.
Once again though he had only obtained a small nod. But that was enough. That was more than enough. Just knowing he was safe was enough.

They had both gotten back into the room now, Amami momentarily pouring a cup of cold iced water for Kiyo to drink - hydrating while calming down had usually seemed to help so hopefully it would this time.
"Here you go, take as many sips as you need and take slow breaths , I promise you it'll help you calm down"
He gave a soft grin towards Shinguji, momentarily sitting beside him afterward.

Korekiyo had began drinking some of the cold , icy liquid as his hands still shook. Thankfully the shaking wasn't as bad as earlier. He managed to slow his breath down too. Thank god Amami had arrived. Though he was still crying he finally felt comfortable and content. He was safe and alright - not completely alright , of course, but atleast it was to a minor extent.
"My appreciation for your actions toward me are very high, thank you Taro. If you hadn't come to check on me I probably would have.... nevermind, please make yourself comfortable"
Though he was still crying , he had managed to convey his speech rather well just as usual- though his breath seemed shaky.

"Kiyo , please do not thank me , it's mandatory for me to check up on you if nobody else will - I do care about you after all"
A light hearted chuckle escaped his mouth before continuing.
"Whenever you wish to discuss the issue we can , please feel free to vent to me okay? For now I don't mind if we just stay silent , I'm always here for comfort if you need a hug .. though I know you aren't the most touchy person, but that's alright , I respect your boundaries"
Rantaro kind heartily smiled once again , trying his best to make Shinguji feel comfortable.

A/N : i'm not continuing the rest because it'll be too similar to previous chapters hhhh i apologise once again , i will continue with other chapters soon to distract me from being overwhelmed jgjfhd