Heroic Villain - The Dream SMP

Chapter 19: Love?

"Dream!" I yell when I finally find him. He quickly turns away from what he was doing, which looked to be building an obsidian wall around L'Manberg. "What are you doing?"

"Tommy burned George's house down." He said while wiping the sweat from his forehead. "So I'm isolating L'Manberg."

"That's quite... irrational." I drag out with raised eyebrows. "I was just wondering if you'd seen Technoblade or have any idea where he might be."

"I don't, why?" Dream asks as he looks at me with suspicion.

"Oh I just wanted to see him, because I haven't seen him for a week." I tell him a bit nervous now that I had to explain why exactly I was looking for the most wanted criminal on the SMP.

"All I know is that he moved out and Phil helped him. If anyone might know where he is, it would be him." Dream tells me. "But I think it would be better if you stayed here, with me."

"Why do you want me here so bad?" I ask him as he walks up to me. "It's not like I'm useful around here."

"I want you by my side, is that so bad?" He asks as he tries to hug me, but I step away and he seemed hurt about that.

"It's bad. You barely know me, Dream."

"I told you, you can call me Clay."

"No, I refuse to call you that, Dream. Just because I'm here doesn't mean we're close friends. I know that what happened between us isn't nothing, but it also isn't everything." I let out as I make some more distance between us. "I can't do this."

"That's okay." Dream brings out after biting his tongue. "You can do whatever you want, I don't control your life."

"That's all I'm asking, thank you." I say, and I mean it.

"There's Phil." Dream says with a nod towards somewhere behind me.

"Thank you, and I mean that, Dream. You've been good to me, I just need some space." I tell him.

"I know, take your time." He tells me and I could tell I hurt him with what I said.

It's just not easy. I've never had someone to care for and at first I thought I would care for Dream like I do for Tubbo and Tommy, but this is different. Tubbo and Tommy are young, they need help, but Dream doesn't need help and he certainly doesn't make me feel the same way as them.

I've never experienced anything like that, so my first reaction is pushing away and I know that isn't right, I just don't know how to handle it any other way.

Obviously there's a word for what I'm feeling, but if someone ever dares to say that out loud, I'll make sure they won't see another day.

Because who loves their greatest enemy?

Surely not me.

Right?

Right...