My First Everything

Its Over

KYO POV

The first thing i saw when i opened my eyes was his face. I woke up in our hotel room and somehow i was on bed with him, staring right into his eyes. He was awake too, just looking at me. Suddenly all those sweet thing i said i saw in him dissapeared. The only thing left was darkness. Slowly, i sat up using the force left in me and leaned at the bed frame for support. The lights were off and it was dark except for the dim moonlight passing through the window.

".........you're part of them this whole time......" i mumbled not bother looking at him. He didn't say a word, instead he got off the bed and walked to the couch there, taking a seat as he crossed his leg, keeping his stare at me.

"all this time........all that we've been through......was it all a lie?"

"all those i love you, the hugs, the kisses and the night.......you never really meant it aren't you?"

Swallowing hard, i bit the tip of my lips so hard to stop me from crying. The words kept getting caught in my throat but i forced myself to keep talking, to ask something that I already knew.

"you're..........using me"

He broke our gaze and gave a heavy sigh. He still didn't say anything but this time.......he was nodding.

There it goes, the truth that had long been untold. He admitted it himself which make it more painful, it cut deeper than any physical wound. I stopped holding my tears and let it out all at once. That's why....he've been asking me about our base......that's why.....he kept on reporting me on a call........that's why.......he never really left my side.

It was all answered now.

"im sorry" he muttered low enough for both of us to hear.

"your sorry wont bring tou-san back"

I wanted to stop talking but i got one more question left. The most important one over everything else and the question that i knew would broke me the most.

"tell me honestly gun,........do you ever really.......love me?" I lifted my face up and locked our eyes together. His eyes held no emotion at all, as if he was staring into some stranger.

"........no, i never love you"

Part of me was torn to pieces. I used to think that he was the other half of me, that we completed each other, that we were meant for each other, but turned out all this time it was just me.

Slowly, i got onto my feet and dragged myself towards him. 'dont loose yourself in front of him' i kept telling myself. I was just an inch away from bursting out and breaking down. He stood up too when i came nearer. He hold me close to him, scooting me over in an instant and i rested my hands on his temple, capturing his handsome face that used to be my everything for the last time. Cause i knew this was the end for us.

I leaned up for a kiss but i stopped before our lips met, just when our lips were about to connect. I stayed gazing into his eyes searching for the old gun that I've fallen in love to but he's not there. No matter how deep I went, he's just not there.

Maybe because the person I've been searching for never exist at all.

But then he leaned down and started kissing me recklessly. Tracing his hands on my back and waist, he carried me back onto the bed and laid me on it.

I tried to escape but he pinned me so tight I couldn't even move. Getting wilder, he nuzzled his face on my neck, licking and biting it all the way down, his breath was hot and hard. But that's not the only thing that got hard.