From The WICKED Start | A Maze Runner Story (English Version)

32. The memory chamber

When I was woken by loud voices, which I didn't know this time, I didn't know when and how I had fallen asleep. Minho and I were still sitting next to each other as we were when Thomas and Teresa had left and I leaned against him exhausted. I felt as if a truck had run over me. I was guaranteed to have bruises everywhere and probably a concussion. I was sure that the memory chamber would completely knock my body down if it didn't kill me, and WICKED would certainly not do me that favour.
What an irony.
Four men in smocks entered the room and two of them took one of us each. I was far too weak to resist and I knew it wouldn't do any good anyway. So I let myself hang limp so they had to carry me while Minho walked beside us with hanging shoulders.
The next time we saw each other, we would have no idea who the other was. A shiver ran down my spine at that thought and I gave him a last look before we were taken to two different cabins.
The memory chamber was smaller than I had expected. I wouldn't have been able to spread my arms, but that was a good thing, because if I couldn't have leaned on my back, I would probably have fallen over again as soon as the two men dropped me off.
I knew that Teresa and Thomas were watching me and this thought somehow kept me on my feet. I was not alone, my friends were with me, even if I couldn't see them. Thomas had been right - in a way they would be watching over me, over us.
The hatch through which they had brought me in was closed and I felt cold water washing around my bare feet. It rose quickly and when it reached my chin I squeezed my eyes together, hoping that it would soon be over and I would forget this.
I could hear Minho screaming next door until the water choked the scream and I too was now completely under water. After a few seconds I noticed my lungs started to fight back and I panicked. I started rowing wildly with my arms, banging against the walls and making a muffled sound.
And then, suddenly, when I was sure I was going to drown, everything went black. Blacker than the black I had seen through my closed eyes. Blacker than anything I had ever seen.
I felt nothing. Not the water, not my lungs craving for air, not the cramping of my body struggling to drown.
At first I thought that I was dead, drowned, that I had not survived the memory chamber because I had simply been too weak. But then I saw a faint glow that broke through the black. In the next second, thousands of images passed me by. I saw Gally, Thomas and everyone who had been with me from the beginning when we first met as children. I saw Gally and me in our countless moments together, watching him grow into the boy he was now. Then I saw Newt lying on the couch in the white room, saw Gally in the memory chamber after I said goodbye to him, and then I saw him being sent into the maze. I watched myself falling in love with Newt without realising it, saw our first kiss, felt all the feelings I had felt for him again.
I was so fascinated by the memories that for a long time I did not notice how those I had already seen did not just pass by, but disappeared when another memory came to the fore. When I came to this realisation, I tried so hard to find them again that I felt like my head was about to burst.
But I could not hold on to them. And suddenly I did not know what I was looking for. What kind of memories? Had there ever been any? I had no idea.
When arms grabbed me and carried me out of the memory chamber, there was only one thing that haunted my mind.
Brown eyes.

I opened my eyes and sat up abruptly, which caused me a lot of pain. Was I hurt?
Now more carefully, I looked around the room where I was lying. There was nothing in it except for a boy who was crouching just a little away from me and was completely soaked. Only now did I notice that I too was completely wet and had no idea why.
I knew nothing at all. Neither what my name was nor where I was or how I had got here.
The boy next to me stirred a little and then opened his eyes too. When he saw me, he looked at me confused. "Where am I? Who are you?"
"I have no idea..." I looked at him confused, too. "I also just woke up and I can't remember anything. Not even my name..."
"Have we met before? I have a feeling I've seen you before..." He stared at me closely.
He looked familiar too, but I had no idea where he came from. When I looked at him as he looked at me, my eyes caught his and I wondered if he was the one whose eyes I had seen. I closed mine and the picture came back immediately. No, it was not his eyes, I was sure of that.
I was about to ask him if he could remember more than I did, when suddenly the door opened. A woman dressed completely in white and a man whom I immediately found terribly repulsive entered the room and stopped in front of us.
They did not introduce themselves and all the woman said as she crouched down in front of us was "No matter what happens, always remember: WICKED is good."
Totally confused, I looked at her. What was that supposed to mean? What was "Wicked"?
"What does that mean?" I heard the boy next to me ask, but he didn't get an answer. Instead, only two other men in smocks came in and gave us both a shot.
I sank to my back and tried to stay conscious convulsively, but it was fading more and more.
The blonde woman bent over me and kept saying "WICKED is good" while I fainted.

I woke up again, opened my eyes and immediately got claustrophobic. Where was I? It was cramped and suddenly I felt the chamber I was in was filled with water. I immediately jumped to my feet, which caused my body a wave of pain.
I have to get out of here immediately. Otherwise I will drown!
In panic I called for help, but nobody came to help me and when the water rose above my head I fought with drowning. Slowly my consciousness slipped away and I was sure I was dying.
But then images appeared before my inner eye, images from a life that somehow seemed familiar to me. They were blurred and when I tried to look closer, they disappeared again. Then a picture came into my mind that must have been connected with such strong feelings that I suddenly felt. That boy with the brown eyes... What was his name? I just wasn't able to think of him. But I was sure that I loved him.
Me? Did I see pictures of my life?
All of a sudden the image of the boy faded and I tried to hold on to him but he slipped away from me. On and on and on.
Something told me that I could not forget him. No way. He was important, even if I did not know exactly why.
Remember him.
Brown eyes.

I gasped for breath and sat up abruptly. A stabbing pain ran through my body. The feeling of drowning disappeared only slowly and I needed something to understand that it must have been a dream.
But where was I? And who was I? What had happened to me?
Someone moaned beside me and I only now realized that I was not alone. The boy lying there sat up slowly and then looked at me in confusion.
"Who are you?" he asked, but before I could answer anything the door was opened and a woman and a man came in, followed by two men in overalls who looked like doctors. I had the feeling of deja-vu for a moment, but that quickly disappeared when one of the men gave me an injection, I got dizzy and all I could hear was the voice of the woman saying: "Always remember: WICKED is good."

Water washed over my body and I opened my eyes when I tried to scream. The scream was nothing but bubbling and I felt my lungs craving for air that I could not give them.
What was happening here?
Everything around me suddenly turned black and I thought I was drowning when the image of a blond boy appeared before my mind's eye and a feeling of security surrounded me. He would help me, I was sure.
But the picture blurred and with it the feeling. Complete darkness surrounded me and I sank into it. I had to remember this boy. He was important, I knew that.
And all I thought of before I passed out were his brown eyes.