Can't Let Go - An SVU fic

Chapter 5

Olivia sat at her desk, her head between her hands as she massaged her temples. Nick's little confession had thrown her for a loop to say the least and she now sat trying to process it.

"Liv... Please say something" Nick begged. He felt like a child who was awaiting punishment for a bad deed - not that a baby was a bad thing but the situation surrounding it...

"And what exactly would you have me say?" She uttered, unable to even look him in the eye but forcing herself to avert her gaze from her laptop keyboard and do just that. "Nick...I don't even know where to begin with this!"

"I screwed up"

"You went beyond screwing up - there's a reason for the no fraternization policy, you know? This is the last thing you need after this mess with Wilkes"

"I know, I know, I just...we were both at a bad place and it just happened. I tried to break it off, ket her down easy but... I blame myself, I should never have let it go so far"

"1PP is gonna have a field day with this"

"You're gonna disclose?"

"Nick, I have to; and I'm also requesting to have Rollins transferred"

"Because of this?"

"No, Nick, because of her insubordination. You know how much trouble I've had with her these last few months and now today, her blatant show of disrespect to her squad and commanding officer... whatever the hell is going on between the two of you is between the two of you - and now 1PP but when she comes into my squad room, my office and dumps her issues in my lap, verbally attacks me... I'm over it."

"Liv, I understand that you have to do what you have to do as far as disclosing to the brass but please, just let me talk to Rollins before you make the move to get rid of her"

"Nick..."

"Look, 1PP will most likely move one or both of us out anyway, the point is, she's not herself right now"

"Nick I get it, I do. She's carrying your child and you feel a responsibility towards her... but I don't. She's out of here. Take the rest of the day."

She meant every word as she picked up the receiver from her desk phone and began dialing. Nick let out a deep sigh, his eyes cast downward as he left the office and shut the door behind him. Olivia, even in her anger over the situation, that her detectives had been so careless as to land themselves and her in such a situation and with wanting to wash her hands of Rollins, she still felt the need to protect them both and wanted to soften the blow of the inevitable fallout. It was with this in mind that when she began dialing, her fingers punched in the number of the one person she knew that in spite of his no-nonsense exterior would be an ally in helping this go over much easier with the brass and listened nervously as the phone rang in her ear, her breath catching when he finally answered.

"Sergeant Benson, what a pleasant surprise." He quipped in his usual stone-faced manner.

"Lieutenant Tucker. I hate to have to call you under these circumstances but I need to meet with you."

... ... ...

In the squad room, Fin walked in as Nick was preparing to leave ...

"I hate court!" Fin announced grumpily "Liv in?"

"Busy" Nick answered, wondering if he should just tell Fin what was going on

"Who died?" Fin asked sarcastically, noticing Nick's melancholy appearance.

"Look, you're gonna hear about this anyway so it might as well be from me" Nick began but was sidetracked when his phone rang "Hold on, man... Amaro" he answered

"Is this detective Nick Amaro?" the woman's voice asked from the other end.

"Yeah, who's this?"

"My name is Kate Smithers, I'm calling from Mercy hospital"

"Mercy? How can I help you?"

"I'm calling on behalf of my patient, Amanda Rollins, she's been in a car accident-" Nick felt his heart drop

"Car accident...is the baby alright?"

"They're both fine, Amanda's pretty banged up and frightened, she asked that I call-"

"I'm on my way!" Nick said with all urgency as he ran out of the squad room, leaving Fin wondering what the call had been about.